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This is my dream girl.
Of course I’m not a Chad with a huge melon.
This is my dating strategy, just exist and hope one day some alt girl just decides were dating now.
Yes, I am indeed this introverted
Can we collectively applaud this? Because I think it deserves it.
Direct and to the point. Not many can boast to be this good at communication.
Definitely Fae if she lives on black licorice, that thing is absolutely not meant for humans
Black licorice is S tier, especially the good and plenty variety
Sure… I’m proud of my comment, I’m now making a list of all the Fae users of Lemmy. You guys can’t trick me now!
I love black licorice 🖤
I’m not entirely sure what Fae is (I’m guessing a fairy?) but I’m from a magical land called New Jersey so I’m pretty sure I’m human
Fae depending on which lore you refer to (usually) means like an umbrella term that includes fairies and any other being that is magical and aligned with nature (but not a beast; dragons aren’t Fae for example)
Fae are like, earth spirits. Not exactly malevolent, but tricksterish, deceptive and vengeful. Not to be trusted. Never eat their food or play their games. Don’t fuck with their animals or their homes or they’ll gaslight you to death
Jersey is best state. Can’t stand black licorice, but my mom and much of our family love it, so I’ll accept it. But Jersey is best state, it bears repeating.
I should visit new Jersey one day, see what all the hype is about
Yes! Every time I see someone making NJ the butt of a joke, I feel the need to reply with a love letter to New Jersey, because it’s legit awesome and I love it 🤍
Either that or Danish. They love that stuff over there for some reason
Don’t forget the Dutch. 😉
Norwegian here. The Danes licquorice consumption does not impress.
The Finns, however… Scary people.
All the Finns I know are delightfully weird.
I have zero game and no clue when it comes to signals.
I need this kind of woman, one that will be forward me.
“Game” doesn’t exist. Clean yourself, be respectful of others, talk to people. That’s the entire game.
You just lost the game btw, but that’s to another pointYou just lost the game btw, but that’s to another point
Fucker
The game ended years ago: https://xkcd.com/391/
You won. Congratulations.
Oh fuck you too. I didn’t finish reading the comment and wouldn’t have lost if it wasn’t for your comment
Bruh I literally haven’t lost the game in years.
Yes there is. I knew a guy who was mostly an asshole, didn’t look after himself, but could always pull hotties. Relationships didn’t last though, so there’s some balance in the world.
The way I see it some people are the type to fall in love head over heels and it gives them the gutso to tell the loved ones how they feel , which can work by the way (everybody enjoys feeling that kind of love). The drawback is often that the type of people that burn that bright runs out of fuel quite soon.
I’m not saying one is better than the other just different strokes for different folks.
Oh believe me, there was no love involved in his one night stands. Which is fine, I’m sure both parties just wanted some fun. I was just amazed at how natural at charming girls he was, despite his idiosyncrasies.
My ‘game’ issue is I kind of break down when I speak to a girl I am interested in.
I get so nervous and overthink that I stop functioning. I run out of things to say and the conversation just doesn’t flow. I put way too much pressure on myself and it is extremely difficult to break out of it.
But if I speak to girls I am not interested in, then I am more myself. No pressure, not trying hard.
My friend was like that. He had a lot of friends who were girls, and the way that he handled that was by putting us all in the “friend” box (he was bi, so he did the same for guys, but given that most guys are straight, that wasn’t as necessary). It was a great method until he ended up hooking up with his best friend — it was a surprise to no-one but him. He walked around looking shellshocked for a week.
Most people wait to speak. A good listener is someone that asks the right question and therefore is assumed to be tuned into the conversation. Ask the right questions, get them talking and you become both a good listener and the strong silent type. There’s no reason or reward for you driving the conversation.
This reminds me of this scene from Tommy Boy
tl;dw - Tommy Boy is trying to sell auto parts to save his family’s business. He gets all stressed out in sales meetings but is able to talk a surly waitress into getting him some chicken wings because the chicken wings don’t matter.
So the next time you’re talking to a cute lady just remember: Chicken wings.
Stop talking to women as if you’re trying to get into their underwear. Speak to them like someone you want to be friends with and if there’s interest both ways something might happen and it might not happen and that’s OK because you made a friend.
I never said I was trying to get into their underwear or pick them up or take them home.
It is not my goal, it is not my aim. I have never had a one night stand.
It’s usually girls I know through other people, friends of friends that I have been around and developed some interest in. I often feel that I only have a small window or a single chance to make a good impression otherwise someone else may catch their attention.
I was young, I was stupid and placed so much pressure on myself and end never ended well.
I’m a lot more calm and comfortable now, but I don’t head to pubs or bars to meet people. Not my thing.
Any interest I have now is the time I spend chatting to a match on a dating app and then meeting up in person.
I really like meeting that person where the conversation just flows naturally, you look at the time and it’s been hours since you first met and didn’t even notice it.
But what if I am just trying to get in their underwear???
Dude has anxiety and you’re talking to him like he’s purposefully being a jerk. Not cool.
No I’m not, I’m talking to them like they’re so anxious because they’re trying to get laid rather than trying to get to know someone.
As a former young man I have also been exactly where the commenter has been and when I stopped looking at women as something to conquer rather than a human being, things started happening for me.
So you’re making an assumption about him AND ignoring the anxiety issue. That’s totally cool, then. Everyone is just like you, ya know. Everyone.
So, I can’t really explain how to do this, but for me the way I overcame that was talking myself into not being interested in them first so I could manage a conversation and get to know them more and from there whatever happens, happens. Obviously you don’t do this long term because you end up with that friendzone/girlfriendzone situation that makes people feel used but if you’re just getting to know someone initially I think it’s fine. It’s also allowed me to filter some out when I learned more about their personality and realized I didn’t like them as much as I thought I did or they made it clear they weren’t into me like that.
Hormone driven anxiety. You don’t actually like those women. You haven’t spoken to them so you don’t know if you like them. You horny them.
Jerk off before you leave the house. It’ll help.
I get so nervous and overthink that I stop functioning
Otherwise known as being a human. Some people more socially anxious than others, but having social interactions helps a lot. Just don’t try to have social interactions for a goal, so to speak. Talk to people about stuff you all interested in, and you will be surprised how quickly the awkwardness melts.
How can you know you’re not interested without having a conversation? Try shifting your focus to having a pleasant conversation, even if that leads to nothing. Not that that is easy all the time but if you’re chatting on a dating app or something it should be doable since it’s not exactly real time. If it’s in real life just own up to it by saying you’re nervous.
Exactly. Mine is basically like this, I was very lucky that we found each other. Most things are literal between us. Faes exist, you’ll find yours
Congrats bro… happy for you…
what are those three things behind the dude? windows? hanging picture frames? I don’t understand what the two angled lines are on the tops of them if they are either of those things.
They look like japanese funeral portraits
This is my partner, minus the goth (her thing was hip-hop).
I wonder just how many times people on the spectrum were looked at as “Fae”.
I’ve definitely seen claims that the idea of “a far stole my baby and replaced it with a changeling” could have been caused by ASD.
I read a long time ago some esoteric bullshit book and the author literally described people on the spectrum as fae changelings.
I’m not entirely sure what this says about me, but this is exactly what I want out of life.
Sorry to hear about your small head.
If you meet a vaguely autistic hottie who is into you, under no circumstances fumble. I don’t usually feel qualified to take my unsolicited life advice that seriously, but I mean it this time.
Instructions unclear, my autism radar isn’t calibrated
The thing is, if you’re autistic it’s super easy to find out who’s neurodivergent - it’s everyone you’ve ever vibed with.
If you’re not, you probably already wanted to stop talking to me.
Yes, BUT I unfortunately can’t stand the cigarette stench.
Switch 'em to vapes (and perhaps a MAO inhibitor), gonna be worth it…
Simply get your partner to change in the way you want
Eh, valid, but the implication is that she needs the stimulant (perhaps due to AD(H)D) or the MAOI in tobacco and OP can substitute a less harmful form that is also less unpleasant. Supplying options is not (necessarily) control and it’s likely less trouble than the shit show that getting ADD drugs is in many places… This can (and should) be done with their consent you know.
Same energy as an unhoused cat choosing its new home.
…blurt in ‘all caps’?
Some people talk like that
There’s a certain mood to someone who speaks in all caps.
Kind of brought a tear to my eye
Don’t worry, that’s just a dhampir with a couple levels in suckubus. You let the right one in.
