Dad has recently gotten himself a much younger girlfriend whom he has moved in last month. My bedroom and their bedroom are wall to wall. The fact that they fuck doesn’t make me uncomfortable - so happy for them, but they do it on max volume. No joke. Every night at 11 and in the morning at 6 on the clock. These walls are paper thin apparently.
Get an airhorn and when they get super loud give it a few blasts and scream “gooooooooaaaal!” At the top of your lungs. Max volume. Do it each time they get loud. If they ask you what you’re doing say you’re watching Euro footie.
Genuinely I think the right answer is to have something really loud and off-putting for them (especially her) and an air horn perfectly fits the bill.
Just ask him what he’s doing when she makes those noises, because you want to try it out on your girlfriend (or have your boyfriend do it to you, either/or, I ain’t gonna judge).
Either ‘I can hear you fuck, keep it down.’ or ‘JFYI the walls are thin.’
Just ask him to keep it down? “Dude I’m pumped for you and all, but I’d really appreciate it if you guys could kick it down a notch”
Play hentai on speakers 😉
Tell them to play a show with very high volume in the background.
Make him buy you a great pair of noise canceling headphones. You can get awesome headphones for like sub $300. That’s well worth it to him I’m sure. And you of course. Win/win here.
Tell him straight up it’s affecting your sleep patterns and you need the things above to get past it.
Offer the girlfriend’s friends as sacrifice and get yours at the same time.
Start coughing loudly and see if they’re sharp enough to infer what that means (if they can hear you, you can hear them).
Have loud sex with a woman his age to turn the tables.
Make it dad’s ex-wife to really get to him.
The oedipus offensive
I giggled far too long at this
Aww man. You made my day, thanks
What if he’s widowed, not divorced
I too choose that guys wife.
There’s nothing like a cool body on a warm summer night.
Did they stutter?
I don’t see another solution.
Have loud sex with dad make girlfriend sleep in your bed?
Genius! She’ll hear the commotion and tell Dad to keep it down.
This is the way.
And dont forget to make eye contact with him to assert dominance.
A true power move.
Don’t be subtle. Be direct and frank. “Dad, I don’t want to hear you having sex with your new girlfriend and I shouldn’t have to put up with it twice a day. Either be quiet or do it when I’m not home.” Throw in some imitations of him or her. He should be mortified enough to behave. Better yet, tell it to both of them face to face. That way there can be no confusion between all parties.
Grow up and move out? It’s his mother fucking house.
You’re downvoted to hell but I mean, it’s true. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
Yeah totally, just pick one of the free houses and move in there with the stable personality you got from the well funded education system.
Frankly if you said this to me I’d probably begin fucking in every room of the house. Then I would fuck in front of you maintaining eye contact.
It’s crazy because I’m liberal as fuck, totally understand how cursed housing is but I still can’t take this as sarcasm.
I’m fully living on my own despite a horrible public school system, no college education, etc. Hell, I moved to Los Angeles with nothing but a backpack and $800 and no high paying job experience.
At some point you have to figure out your life and move on; sitting around and blaming everyone else for your problems won’t get you anything.
things people with privilege say
Seriously. We don’t even know how old the poster is, just that their dad is 48.
I was 20 when my dad was 48. I was in college and was only ‘home’ over the summers and winter break (when the dorms closed). My brother was 15. I don’t think it’d be reasonable to tell either of us to move out just because the adults in our lives were a tad indiscrete.
You don’t fucking know me bro. I’m not privileged in the least, the most I’ve borrowed from my parents is $20 and I worked for minimum wage all throughout my 20s.
Just because I’m not a deadbeat loser doesn’t mean I’m privileged.
i don’t think you understand what privilege is bro
OP should definitely enforce boundaries, but this sounds like a fetish, which is fucked up, especially for the dad. If you’re an adult, you know your child is in the next room, and you’re banging at “max volume”, you’re wanting to be heard. 🤮
Doubtful.
I’ve been surprised at what and how much you can hear through a wall. Often it seems like you’re being silent, but that headboard is gently tapping on the wall and reverberating out the other side like a jackhammer.
Well I’m inferring your dad’s not a young lad anymore, twice a day is quite impressive even more at 6 o’clock! I think they’re a bit in the honeymoon phase, it’ll mellow eventually*.
But to answer your question I have two options: -Tell him to lower the volume or pick some time you’re not home IF it’s your home, as in your dad has come to live with you or you are roommates, or you are too young to live by your own. -But IF it’s his home and you are old enough then get your own flat/room or some good headphones and let them enjoy life.
*Or not, I don’t know your dad or his girlfriend. Wish them the best tho.
Idk about all that…. My son coulda wrote this IF he didn’t sleep through literally everything
Same. Been together a couple decades and we are still in the honeymoon phase.
The loud part of the 1812 Overture as soon as he’s finishing.
Stay respectfully, forget subtly. Say it like it is.
Agreed. I wouldn’t interrupt their fun, but I’d mention it to my dad some time when the girlfriend wasn’t around. I’d send an email or text if I felt too embarrassed/shy to say anything face-to-face. “Hey, Dad. Just FYI the walls are really thin in this apartment and I can hear what you two get up to.”
I’d also look into earplugs. Earplugs + bone conductive headphones could be a good work around. I’m a fan of Shokz, but other brands exist.
In fact asking dad to buy new headphones could be a way to transition into that conversation.
“Hey, dad, will you buy me these?”
“Um…why?”
“11 and 6 dad. I need them for 11 and 6. Y’all ain’t subtle.”
This is the best answer in the thread. Add in eye contact and eyebrow gesture.
Yeah, if they don’t care or realise that they’re shagging to loud, they aren’t going to realise if they’re told subtly.
Clap and say bravo at the end of it.
This will send a message.
“Encore!” 👏
Put some Dio on loud speakers and place them next to the shared wall
When dad’s going down on her:
HOLY DIVER!
You’ve been down too long in the midnight sea
Oh what’s becomin’ of me
No, no, ride the tiger
You can see his stripes but you know he’s clean
Oh don’t you see what I mean
HOLY DIVER!
There will never be another quite like Ronnie James Dio.
Dio has rocked for a long long time.
But now its time for him to pass the torch
He has songs of wildebeasts and angels
He has rocked on the wings of a demon
Fuck that, put cbat on
But then they’ll just start fucking to that rhythm, everyone knows it’s the best song to fuck to
Imagine midway in sex being thrusted into silently to that beat
I don’t know if I’d be mad or start laughing
Don’t lie, we all know the result would be you immediately climaxing
When you know they’re in there, but it’s not 11pm or 6am, call up someone on the phone, or cough, or hum to yourself. Just make mid level noises. The point is to get them to realize that if they can hear you, then you can hear them.
