• Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        Which time?

        Edit: oh dammit. I now see someone else already made this joke. Ok, to make it up to you, I’ll tell a different joke.

        So a woman in her Chicago high rise apartment was beating a rug with a broom on her balcony. Suddenly a big burst of wind blew her over the railing.

        Now she’s falling from the 30th floor.

        A man on the 25th floor sees this, catches her, and says “Wow, it must be my lucky day! A beautiful woman falls out of the sky and into my arms! Tell me young miss, do you suck dick?”

        Outraged by this she screams “NO I DON’T SUCK DICK!!!”

        So he drops her.

        A man on the 20th floor sees her falling, and catches her. He says: Wow, it must be my lucky day! A beautiful woman falls out of the sky and into my arms! Tell me young miss, would you be willing to fuck me?"

        Insulted by the idea she screams “NO I DON’T FUCK STRANGERS!!!”

        So he drops her.

        As she’s falling, she realizes she’s going to die, and in her final moments she prays. “Please god, just let ONE more person catch me! I promise to do any revolting thing they ask!”

        And on the 15th floor, a woman catches her. Before her rescuer can say a word, the woman screams “I SUCK! I FUCK! I’LL DO ANYTHING YOU WANT!!!”

        Revolted by this, the woman holding her says “Slut!”

        And drops her.

    • kmartburrito@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      His plan will be to “give Putin everything he wants”

      And then he’ll be like “aren’t I the greatest negotiator?!?”

  • Rakonat@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Same plan he made in Syria and Afghanistan. Abandon US allies in the region, hand over all local assets to hostile forces and leak intel like damn spaghetti strainer.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if he ordered the DoD to hanf over all the intel we have about Ukraine to Russia and withdraw all other support and recon in the area.

    • small44@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      The USA, Iran and Russia are responsible for syrian civil war. None should have got involved in it

      • Rakonat@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        Be as that may be, Trump absolutely selling out the Kurdish Militia that was a long time US ally in the region was not acceptable.

        • rayyy@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          Trump absolutely selling out the Kurdish Militia

          Shhh, the MSM isn’t saying anything negative about the orange felon.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldM
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            5 months ago

            Imperial powers created Syria. Modern Syria anyway. The entire Middle East has been an Imperial project since colonialism. Pretty much only the Saudis and Israel (and Iran, if you want to count it as Middle Eastern) aren’t on board.

            • Pelicanen@sopuli.xyz
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              5 months ago

              I mean, not for lack of trying, they did stage a coup and plant the Shah of Iran as the leader for a while

          • Apollo42@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            Of course it had nothing to do with the repressive authoritarian regime killing its own people because they had the temerity to protest.

            • small44@lemmy.world
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              5 months ago

              Of course the usa support rebels because they care about syrians and human life and not because they only cares about their own interest. The usa representing democracy is the number one supported of coups over the world, the country who represent human rights ignores the crimes commited by israel and is allying with saudi arabia. The countries who had revolutions without imperialist powers didn’t fell into a civil war inlike all other revolutions with russia or usa interference.

      • chaogomu@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        The start of the Syrian civil war had nothing to do with anyone except the Syrian people being pissed off at living under the most restrictive police state in the Arab world. There were protests after a mass arrest and subsequent torture of 15 teenage boys who had spay-painted some anti-government graffiti on some walls around the city.

        Assad cracked down on the protests hard, which led to people saying, “fuck this shit, time for a revolution”.

        Iran started helping Assad, and then the US started helping the rebels. And yeah it’s a shit show now. But no, it would have kicked off without outside help.

        • small44@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          A lot of people would still have died without outside intervention and syrian had the right to kick of the revolution against asad. I don’t disagree with that but outaide intervation definitely made it a lot worse. Ben ali wasalso very brutal but due to the lack of interests from major powers the revolution in tunisia was relatively very peaceful

          • chaogomu@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            Again, the context is important. Mostly that the Tunisian military refused to step in and support Wasalo, eventually forcing him to flee.

            Asad on the other hand, is still very popular with his own ethnic group, and draws heavily from them to staff his military. Iran’s help just made things worse.

    • OBJECTION!@lemmy.ml
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      5 months ago

      Liberals will criticize ending a pointless 20 year war and somehow still not realize that they’re jingos.

      • FatCrab@lemmy.one
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        5 months ago

        The criticisms are universally about how he “ended” it. I have seen no one that was in favor of staying. Likewise, Trump gets criticism on betraying our allies because he knowingly and intentionally ratfucked the kurds, or have you totally forgotten about that?

        • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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          5 months ago

          Trump didn’t end the war in Afghanistan. Biden did. The President who determined how that happened was Joe Biden.

          • irreticent@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            “The Trump administration in February 2020 negotiated a withdrawal agreement with the Taliban that excluded the Afghan government, freed 5,000 imprisoned Taliban soldiers and set a date certain of May 1, 2021, for the final withdrawal.”

            “And the Trump administration kept to the pact, reducing U.S. troop levels from about 13,000 to 2,500, even though the Taliban continued to attack Afghan government forces and welcomed al-Qaeda terrorists into the Taliban leadership.”

            • OBJECTION!@lemmy.ml
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              5 months ago

              “And the Trump administration kept to the pact, reducing U.S. troop levels from about 13,000 to 2,500, even though the Taliban continued to attack Afghan government forces and welcomed al-Qaeda terrorists into the Taliban leadership.”

              So should the withdrawal have been stopped at that point? Exactly how much longer do you think we should’ve stayed in Afghanistan?

        • OBJECTION!@lemmy.ml
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          5 months ago

          And that criticism was always bullshit. There’s no “right” way to retreat, it was always going to play out the way it did. Journalists criticized it in bad faith, because it generated clicks and because they never actually opposed the war, because again, war is great for clicks. In reality, what happened when the US pulled out was the culmination of 20 years spent doing nothing to stabilize the country and only making the Taliban stronger.

          But go ahead then, armchair strategist, and describe to me what specifically could’ve been done differently about the withdrawal that would not have resulted in things playing out the way they did.

          Opposing the withdrawal is the same as supporting the war. The withdrawal was one of the only good things Biden did in his whole career and liberals will never forgive him for it. Worse yet, you want to allow Trump to claim credit for it when Biden’s the one who actually saw it through and had to deal with the flak from it.

      • AbidanYre@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        Trump didn’t withdraw from Afghanistan. Biden followed the timeline trump set (with a slight delay, maybe?) and got no end of shit for it.

        Trump negotiated with the Taliban without inviting the Afghan government, and released a bunch of them from prison.

        For fuck’s sake, if you want to shit on liberals at least try and get your talking points right.

        Blue MAGA

        Further proof that you’re an unserious clown.

        • Linkerbaan@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          My talking points are from reality not from liberal propaganda. Trump retreated the majority of the troops already. Biden finished the retreat. It most definitely started with Trump.

          As part of the United States–Taliban deal, the Trump administration agreed to an initial reduction of US forces from 13,000 to 8,600 troops by July 2020, followed by a complete withdrawal by 1 May 2021, if the Taliban kept its commitments. At the start of the Biden administration, there were 2,500 US soldiers remaining in Afghanistan

          I’m not sure what “Afghan government” you are talking about. The puppets we put in power which were rampantly raping children because we backed them up? As soon as the money was gone the “Afghan government” dissolved within a day. Literally. Those people were not ideologically driven they were just a bunch of corrupt druggies that got a free pass to rape children as long as they obeyed us.

          If you want to dunk on Trump bring up January 6, his Muslim ban or any other of the million stupid things he did, not him retreating from Afghanistan. Talk about talking points…

      • TheClockStruck13@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        I’ve been digging into the whole rape thing, correct me if I’m wrong but it looks a lot like a smear campaign than anything else, that is which to say, there is zero evidence he did this and yet the mainstream media has been instructed to go hard with it lately to perhaps persuade the public to vote against him… thoughts?

        • JesusSon@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          “As the court explained in its recent decision denying Mr Trump’s motion for a new trial on damages and other relief [in the New York case] … based on all of the evidence at trial and the jury’s verdict as a whole, the jury’s finding that Mr Trump ‘sexually abused’ Ms Carroll implicitly determined that he forcibly penetrated her digitally – in other words, that Mr. Trump, in fact, did ‘rape’ Ms. Carroll as that term commonly is used and understood in contexts outside of the New York penal law.” - Lewis A. Kaplan: Senior Judge of the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York.

          • bloodfart@lemmy.ml
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            5 months ago

            Am I reading this right that it’s because a civil decision by jury implies rape?

            • FanciestPants@lemmy.world
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              5 months ago

              Pretty much, except it may be more appropriate to replace “implies” with “determined there was sufficient evidence to conclude”

              • bloodfart@lemmy.ml
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                5 months ago

                Listen, I’m not a lawyer, I’m not trying to say I am.

                It’s widely understood that civil litigation is held to a lower level of scrutiny than criminal proceedings are.

                It’s widely accepted that jury trials are more prone to error than other types of hearings.

                The legal meaning of the word “implicit” in that sentence is something close to “we didn’t ask the jury about this, but something they did rule on could be interpreted as implying it”.

                I’m not making an excuse for trump or normalizing rape when I say the following:

                That is paper fucking thin.

        • lepinkainen@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          He’s been on Epsteins plane 7 times. He was his friend.

          Trump also knew Epstein liked “younger girls”.

          It’s all in court documents

        • FatCrab@lemmy.one
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          5 months ago

          You have been corrected because you are very obviously wrong. Are you going to integrate this correction into your espoused views going forward or are you just going to repeat the same brain dead bullshit again and again?

        • BeBa@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          By “digging into” do you mean “reading about it on truth social”? Because that is the only way in which someone might look into this situation and conclude trump isn’t guilty

          • TheClockStruck13@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            I use twitter because it has the community notes thing and tends to allow both sides of the spectrum to state their views

        • lolcatnip@reddthat.com
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          5 months ago

          It’s virtually impossible to smear Trump, because what could you come to with that’s worse than the truth?

    • fluxion@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      Everyone knows this, but it’s difficult to point out how dogshit Trump’s “plan” is if he refuses to state what his actual plan is.

    • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      And when Putin asks Trump to accept the end of Ukraine and no longer accept the Ukrainian language as separate from Russian, he will immediately do some executive orders.

    • t_chalco@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      “Our government has a [flexible] policy not to capitulate to [the oligarch that owns my debt and may, possibly have some lewd photos] demands.” - Trump quoting Patron Saint of Neoliberalism, Golden Idol of the GOP, Ronald Wilson Regan

      • AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        Given their track records, maybe we shouldn’t vote anyone with the name Wilson in their name to the highest office anymore…

  • cultsuperstar@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Remember when Trump said he would get rid of the ACA and they had a plan to replace it? But he never had a plan and eventually said “who knew healthcare was so complicated?” (Everybody knew it was complicated.) This is the exact same thing.

    • HubertManne@moist.catsweat.com
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      5 months ago

      if trump was president in 1940 ww2 would have never happened. Also ww1 for 1914. and civil war for 1861. If trump was president before we would all live in solid gold houses and drive rocket cars with zero pollution

  • Tronn4@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    It’s sucking putins dick and giving him the land already stolen from Ukraine

  • Sludgehammer@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    I’m guessing Trump’s plan to end the war is “Back Russia and help Putin crush Ukraine.” Because (much like Trump’s own sycophants) he doesn’t realize that he’ll the first under the bus when his master no longer needs him.

  • JJROKCZ@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    The plan is stop supporting Ukraine and support Russia. You know this Zelenskyy…

  • mommykink@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    The Ukraine War would end within a week without US support. It would take a Trump admin doing literally nothing for the war to end. That’s his plan. To do nothing.

    • RunawayFixer@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      USA aid is very important to Ukraine, but even without it they would continue fighting. Ukraine has been without USA material aid for months already in the past, when the republican party was blocking it. And as it turned out, Ukraine sustained higher casualties and had less offensive power than with USA aid, but they were never close to folding.

      Ukrainians + their supporting neighbours are very motivated to not be occupied by Russia, so they’re not going to just give up if Putin’s stooges come to power in the USA.

      • Barbarian@sh.itjust.works
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        5 months ago

        There’s also the fact that a hypothetical end to US aid wouldn’t end EU aid. It’s definitely not on the same scale as the US due to our much smaller military sector, but that’d likely change in the event of a US shut-down of aid.

        In my mind, the most likely results would be:

        Short-term: Very dangerous period for Ukraine, they lose some ground, lots of men (similar to the last time they had a crippling artillery shell shortage).

        Medium-term: EU military sector slowly ramps up to meet demand, as about 3/4 of central & eastern EU considers this an existential war that cannot be lost at any cost.

        Long-term: After the war is over (however many more years that takes), Russia finally negotiates some kind of ceasefire where they can save some face internally and brag about how they “Denazified” Ukraine while going home and accomplishing nothing, EU is much more self-sufficient and therefore buys less from the US, and they aren’t seen as a trust-worthy ally militarily anymore. Even if on paper most EU members are still in NATO, they consider the security guarantees of the EU as much more important and serious.

        • Kaput@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          Heck, Trump declared Canada, a strategic risk during his s presidency. Just to stop steel imports. No one can consider the USA a reliable ally as long as Maga is around.

        • Valmond@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          Crippling russian economy might lead to yo a coup, putins death or just his health declining can also lead to instability which can lead to a coup too etc. A soft coup some years down the line for example.

    • Slotos@feddit.nl
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      5 months ago

      Occupying a country that size doesn’t take a mere week. So no, it won’t.

  • lolcatnip@reddthat.com
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    5 months ago

    Everyone is saying his plan is to give Ukraine to Russia, but his actual plan is to try to give all of Europe to Russia by pulling out of NATO.