What on Earth would have to possess me to get in that situation in the first place?!
You know… I think I risk it all and take the blindfold off. Perhaps I am Icarus flying too close to the sun but whilst on the brink of perfection, why not take the plunge?
(NSFW?) spoiler
___
This is not only AI slop but assumes I am Putin. Totally ruins it. If I woke up one day and realized I was Putin, the first fucking thing I’d do is put a bullet through my brain.
I love how you think
I’m pretty sure I’m completely missing the point, but how on earth did you find yourself in the situation? Like your dick out and blindfolded in a location that virtually anyone can walk into. All of a sudden with little warning you feel something happening down there but you don’t peek or ask what’s up, you just sit there silently and long enough for you to realize you’re getting the best blowjob of your life.
Honestly the more I describe the scenario the more I realize unless it’s a trusted partner, this is not the type of scenario that most women would immediately just start going to town without reason. So if you are strictly looking for a woman, at very least one of sound mind you are probably SOL.
I thought Marco Pole-blow was one of those universal games everyone grew up playing.
This is kind of what I was thinking. In order for a situation like this to ACTUALLY happen, there is a complete, flat 0% chance that an attractive woman will be involved in any part of this unless you’re doing some kind of roleplay thing with your partner in the bedroom. So by default its going to be Bill Cosby’s dog or some shit.
what, you guys have never gone to a sex dungeon and slapped on a blindfold and sat in the Free Use chair??
You KNOW that’s still going to be a dog.
It’s a thought experiment. How the fuck do you find yourself in the trolley problem?
You really need to consider the possibilities when deciding whether to take off the blindfold. I think it’s reasonable to reflect a bit on how you got there to narrow the possibilities down somewhat.
Also, while i dont have a dick the concept can translatez and i do not fear the dark. I will not shy away from the abyss. Its kinda my thing. If i enjoy something, i enjoy it. I may lie to the world, but i will not lie to myself.
Even if it’s, like, a dog, and i have a new problematic fetish.
But what if it’s an old wrinkly man going down like it’s no tomorrow?
Now i know.
Do you understand what my username means?
Nope.
Hippie philosopher robert anton wilson had this concept, ‘chapel perilous’, where at the limits of knowing you must either accept that you can’t be totally certain about anything, or become an american style conspiracy nut as you retreat into solipsism.
That, but for shittiness instead of truth.
There is a point at which you must either drown yourself in toxic positivity, or accept that everything sucks, at least a little.
Right, im explaining (a little of) how they’re missing the point.
Perhaps most women wouldn’t, but Bill Cosby might.
Internet is fucked.
Hey its me, your internet.
Yeah but this is old fashioned internet fucked and i approve.
Always has been 🌎👨🚀🔫👨🚀
Of course I’m taking it off.
Knowledge has value. Are you so willing to give up any future chances just to not ruin this one? You may learn more on this art and its scholars!It was Ted Cruz
If I could choke him to death after, that would be a consolation prize I’d be fully and gladly willing to accept.
I don’t know what this means but it makes me giggle.
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Ain’t no way booger lip isn’t making noises that’ll give it away.
With Donald Trump hitting the balls from behind.
Too little to gain and too much to lose in removing it. Just enjoy the experience and leave it at that
Don’t you stand to gain the whole world though? Now you know what you like and can seek to duplicate it?
https://media1.tenor.com/m/OhSittlaBH8AAAAd/robbie-rotten-shocked.gif (ugh I don’t know how to embed, especially on mobile…)
Words of wisdom from our friend RageCock over here.
It’s a perfectly cromulent Estonian name
“When a gift horse is munching on one’s carrot, one must be very careful not to look it in the mouth.” - Albert Confucius, 1969-04-20
You got my like for the date. But now: get out!
This reminds me of my ex who liked sucking dick so much i swear she sucked out my soul a couple times.
My wife has sadly never gotten close to those levels of sloppy toppy, i would never tell her tho lol i love her too much and she tries :p.
It’s unbelievably hot when you’re getting blown with enthusiasm though… Slurping away like my dick is the last ice cream cone they had at the store during an August heatwave is sublime, even a mid grade delivery gets upgraded when it’s clearly desired instead of a choice or foreplay obligation.
This blew my mind the first time I experienced it. I thought I just didn’t like receiving head for the longest time, because none of my past girlfriends really liked doing it and my pleasure tends to be pretty empathetic. Then I “dated” a woman in an open relationship/swinger situation who actively wanted my dick in her mouth most of the time. The first time she blew me (and honestly also most times after that too) she managed to get me into a full on autistic sensory overload state, like to the point that I was forgetting to breathe. It worked out super well for me because that made her feel like a sex goddess, and she really liked repeating that experience. It was strange because like, I’ve never felt more submissive in my life than when she had me in her mouth. She could turn me into a lump of playdough with a hopelessly misfiring central nervous system, and I was entirely at her mercy when that happened. I’d still make ruinous life decisions to spend another night in her bed lol
I definitely peaked too soon in the receiver of blowjob stakes. First real GF genuinely loved to suck dick, she lived for that shit and I swear I had more and better krgasms during that year than the rest of my life since.
Oh well, better to have loved and lost eh
My very first blowjob was the best thing ever. I’ve never disliked them afterwards, but I can relate to what you are saying.
None of my other girlfriends had been into it, which was fine. I would never pressure someone into doing something that they didn’t want to do. Then I met this woman and we hit it off almost immediately. On our fist date I brought her a Red Rose and did my best to behave like a gentleman. This impressed her and she asked me to ‘wait until she was more comfortable with me’ before having sex, to which I happily agreed.
Over the next week I saw her several times, and each time our make out sessions would get more and more steamy. Finally just a week later it had been enough time. Turns out she was kind of a Nympho and waiting was just as hard for her as it was for me. She texted me at work to let me know and asked me to pick her up after I got off. On the car ride to my place she made a speech about how I shouldn’t expect blowjobs because she reserves that for very special people and she wasn’t going to be just anybody’s ‘Blowjob Queen’. I said that was fine with me.
I was all gross and sweaty from working a full day, and when we got back to my place I told her I needed to hop in the shower real quick before we got busy. She said that it didn’t matter to her and that she was ready to go. I insisted though because I didn’t feel sexy being that sweaty. I have never washed myself faster in life, but less than 3 minutes after getting in the shower she opens the shower curtain and was standing there in a black see through negligee, asking me what was taking so long. That finally convinced me that I was clean enough so I hopped out of the shower and said just give me 30 seconds to brush my teeth.
You can probably guess what happened next. Standing there in the bathroom with toothpaste still in my mouth and brushing like a madman, she decided to be my Queen after all. It was so hot, no one in life has ever made me feel as attractive and wanted as she did that night.
I should have married her.
Stop making us all jealous.
Well my wife hates giving head so I’ll never have a good one again so swings and roundabouts…
I have been with my gf for 6 years and not once have I gotten any so… I would take a bad one over none. She does not even seem to enjoy me going down on her sadly. So no oral sex in this relationship.
If she’s not ace, maybe she should ask her Dr about hormone imbalances.
Women who don’t get enough testosterone can have low libido.
She could be ace. She was on hormonal birth control for like 1.5 years without any real change. Would hormonal imbalance show a different way as well? I don’t want to just tell her to go get that checked because she has low libido.
Hormonal imbalances can worsen the symptoms of depression.
But maybe talk and see if she has a desire to be more intimate but just isn’t ever in the mood, or if she doesn’t have a desire to be more intimate. Because if the desire isn’t there, that could be a different thing like maybe being ace.
My wife found she was low on T because she didn’t like never feeling horny and asked her Dr. Her depression has improved since she started hormone supplements too.
i still havent found what im looking for
It would be me sucking your dick if you decide to take the blindfold off.
Hey hi how’re you doing?
Speaking from a purely analytical ace/sex-repulsed position:
Removing the blindfold can only at best ruin the prize you’ve already got. You remove the blindfold and find out the best beej in the world comes from Supreme Fellator Donald J. Trump? No ma’am, there is no coming back from that. Leave it on.
I dunno’, I’d still be happy as a lark if I could slap him in to an early grave after taking the blindfold off…
He’s more of a toes guy.
I don’t give a shit if it’s mother Theresa slobbing my job, as long as I get their number and they’re game to do it again.
Call me bb.
But what if it turns out to be your actual mother…
Then he already has the number
I said what I said.
This is the only answer that makes sense. How’re you meant to reconnect with this thing, whatever it might be, if you don’t take off your blindfold? That said, I’d rather not flowers for algernon myself in the first place.
But is that even a possibility? I don’t think you get a second as that one would’t be as good.
You don’t just luck into the Olympics. If it’s something odd like an ancient hermit in Malaysia-
and it just struck me that it might be someone or something wildly unethical. I’d at first considered disgust to be my sole concern, but between age and state of life, I’m keeping the blinders on and never taking them off.
She’d be a zombie so you should care, as your next trip would be to the pharmacy to get some antiseptic creams.
One has to be a Giver to give great head. I think youre safe.
I think you underestimate the power of spite
Oh really? And how many dicks have you sucked out of spite? What sort of scenario would that even occur in? Where would one even find such a place!? Like what address!?
Let me introduce you to my wife
Might be near a bunch of repressed individuals like a gop convention but I don’t know I’m not a very spiteful person I just know there are tales of people with great spite like one guy who created and buried a fake giant made of stone I think just to get back at a guy
I think it depends on your D/s spectrum.
As a Dom, I’d humiliate him.
But then again, BDSM relationships require continual respect.
Damn this is a hard one.
I’m a humiliated non-con no-respect sub in my relationship with my findom government and lemmy tell you: This. Fucking. Sucks.
I rip the blindfold off right as I ejaculate.
“WRONG MOVE, BUSTAH!”
I mean, Willem Dafeo is such a legend… I think you’d be surprised at how many people prefer character over looks…
Yer fond of me lobster, ain’t ya!?
Hah! Joke’s on you, I low key would…
This is just a glory hole with extra steps.
A glory hole with the guarantee that it’s the best head you’ll ever get
which is just a cum jar with fewer steps!
as an everyone hot bisexual I wanna see whose genitals I’m tounging next
Even if it’s a dog, though? 😂
my brother in Christmas, that’s on you
No, that’s literally within the hypothetical.
I’d bet money on the best bj imaginable is given by a femboy. Thus the blindfold comes off. I must see the love of my life.
50/50 odds it’s a bear.
Or one of those fish that clean the side of the tank in Chinese restaurants.
I, uh, hope we’re imagining the same kind of bear.
And I hope we’re imagining the same kind of suckerfish.
Like Cypher said in The Matrix: “Ignorance is bliss”.
Right before putting that delicious meat in his mouth