• OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world
    65·
    20 days ago

    I once dated a girl for a while but we stopped dating because she was just too BPD for me to handle. The passion & sex were great, but the mood swings, lies, paranoia, etc. were just too much.

    We remained friends though for a very long time. Went our separate ways but were always in touch. Eventually she got into drugs & dating real bad dudes, and I tried to get her to get a grip and stop the drugs & ruining her life. She ghosted me. Eventually she responded (or rather her boyfriend did) that she was in a psych ward for rehab. Our friendship resumed when she got out.

    A year later she died. I met her family at the funeral, befriended them. One day I mentioned her psych ward stay. Her mom said she was never in a psych ward. She pulled up texts on her phone from the date range when she allegedly was in the ward.

    The whole thing was a sham. She told me she was in the psych ward / rehab to get me off her back. The txt from her bf was just her.

    I miss my friend dearly, but finding that out broke my heart.

  • e$tGyr#J2pqM8v@feddit.nl
    35·
    20 days ago

    Working as a nurse in acute psychiatric care, I can tell you the comparative normality of non-psychiatric-patients is easily overestimated. No need to stigmatize those in need of little help now and then. We all do.

    • Apytele@sh.itjust.works
      29·
      20 days ago

      Men love BPD chicks because we’ll be obsessed with them and could suck the paint off a trailer hitch but they act all shocked when they realize they need Steve Irwin level animal handling skill to not get their face chewed off and that they might just get speared to death anyway. My guy, do you want to live life on the edge or not?

  • 4grams@awful.systemsEnglish
    26·
    20 days ago

    Lol, this literally happened to me once.

    Long story short, a girl I knew but always figured was way out of my league expressed interest in me. We quickly started dating, I thought I was the luckiest guy in the world. A few weeks go by and she just ghosts me. Nothing for weeks, I was going nuts. Finally I get a message from her, she had checked herself into the psych ward, and wound up hooking up with one of the staff while she was there.

    Dodged a real one there…

    • AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.netEnglish
      31·
      20 days ago

      Hooking up with one of the staff? Yikes

      I don’t deny that you may have dodged a bullet, but I feel like the staff of a psych ward hooking up with patients is hella fucked up. Even if both people are adults, I think consent in that context is pretty dubious.

      • 4grams@awful.systemsEnglish
        13·
        20 days ago

        wholeheartedly agree. I was but 19 years old though and less wise in the ways of the world. I occasionally try to look her up but have had no luck, I really hope she turned out ok. Been decades though.

      • boboliosisjones@feddit.nu
        3·
        20 days ago

        From what I heard its super common for psych ward staff to be doing patients. And yeah it can’t be very helpful in their situation…

          • Apytele@sh.itjust.works
            11·
            20 days ago

            One of the medical clinic nurses at the state Psych hospital I worked at would give any patient a condom if they asked and not tell anyone. Like. It was known to administration and it was one of her official responsibilities to do so, but she would not reveal who she gave them to or keep any records. We would absolutely stop them if we caught them but you can’t always catch people before they make a wholeass new person.

            • zqps@sh.itjust.works
              5·
              20 days ago

              Now I’m imagining being conceived between two psych ward patients and I’m like… really trying not to sound judgemental, but that’s not great odds for the baby both in terms of a stable and nurturing environment growing up, and a genetic predisposition towards mental instability later in life.

          • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
            3·
            20 days ago

            My comment was in no way about who deserves to procreate, but who gets to have the fun of the process.

      • TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world
        11·
        21 days ago

        They do fuck pretty good. It’s like holding a tiger by the tail. In one instance the tiger is sure to like it. Right?

      • teamevil@lemmy.world
        10·
        21 days ago

        I mean you’re right if you vibe with similar crazy but that withdrawal and collateral damage…ouch.

        -even if you don’t vibe it’s going to be amazing

    • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
      13·
      20 days ago

      I don’t think you understand the demographics of a psych ward. When I went (technically a pediatric one) it was 50% people who self harm and got caught, 30% people who are depressed and it got too bad, 10% overdoses, and only 10% ‘crazy’ people

      a lot game from disadvantaged backgrounds and just didn’t have the best start with abusive parents and shit and take it out on themselves. They just need stability and care, care that a significant other could give.
      I guess I could be put into this category too.

      the ‘crazy’ people were chill, they just talked to themselves and saw stuff sometimes. They’re not like… mean.

      the ‘crazy’ people that you are probably thinking of aren’t the ones who go to the psych ward. They say that they’re normal and blame others for their issues. They’re the ones who don’t want to be associated with people with depression and bipolar syndrome so they don’t seek treatment for it and get WAY worse than if they went to therapy instead of drugs.

      It’s also worth noting that the ‘crazy’ people you’re thinking of aren’t past saving. They need help too. They probably started off with a bad background and weren’t taught how to take accountability and coping techniques. It’s just really, REALLY difficult to admit you need help and to go through the process of getting it.

      People do recover and should be given assistance, assistance that the American system doesn’t give.

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
      13·
      20 days ago

      Fucking sliding doors moment right here, reading this comment is the proximate cause of my eventual murder and dismemberment by a big tiddy jailbird gf.

      • LousyCornMuffins@lemmy.worldEnglish
        2·
        20 days ago

        Dude I fucking hate that movie. I’m in the (personal, not global. I know we’re all in the global bad universe) bad universe and I do not like thinking about the good one

    • Jiggle_Physics@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
      8·
      20 days ago

      Many years ago I responded to one of these inmate pen-pal things. I did it because Susan Smith, the woman who pushed her car into a lake with her small kids in it, was one of the people on the pen-pal list. I wrote a letter, but got a boiler plate response from the prison about her no longer being on the pen-pal project due to an over whelming response.

      I remember the profile she had though, discussing how she loved rainbows, and mini mouse

    • qyron@sopuli.xyz
      5·
      20 days ago

      Considering the US penal system, I’d risk many are in for ridiculous things.

      • red_bull_of_juarez@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        6·
        20 days ago

        Definitely. But a while ago, when I first saw this site in a post, I found one young woman who had in her bio that she was very submissive and looking for a daddy. When I looked her up, I found out that she was doing 8 years or so for sexually abusing a 12 year old girl. That’s what I mean when I say that there are some crazy-ass bitches on that site.

  • rabber@lemmy.caEnglish
    102·
    20 days ago

    Started dating a girl with bpd and have never been so excited yet so confused, my life is fucked now i think but she’s super hot so whatever