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Cake day: May 18th, 2024

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  • My friend in high school let me borrow his PS3 copy of DS1, telling me it was one of the best games ever.

    I died to the skeletons in the graveyard around ten times (trolled lol) and promptly put it down.

    Cut to much later, Elden Ring comes out and one of my friends is so excited that he gifts me the game at full price so I can experience it too.

    And here comes one of the few times I’m braggadocious about gaming

    For I say, “No, I have unfinished business first.”

    I buy Dark Souls Remastered and start a Sorceror INT/DEX build. It’s tough. I recommend STR+Zwei instead for a first playthrough. Managing casts during runbacks is especially brutal. I die to the Capra Demon way too many times, git gud, and fight my way all the way to the edge of Blighttown, where I decide to stop for the night.

    The next day, I boot up the game, hit Continue, and a message pops up saying, “The save data is corrupted.”

    But when I read it, my brain sees, “YOU DIED.”

    What am I going to do, go hollow?

    So I start another save. Back to Blighttown. It’s not easy, but it’s something I just did. This time I keep playing. Get to that bonfire, kindle it, and save for the night.

    The next day, “The save data is corrupted.”

    I’m just infuriated at this point. Really Darkin’ my Soul rn.

    But I restart again. Grind for the Balder Side Sword as soon as I get to the Undead Parish. Git gud. Now my level 11 character is doing as much damage as my previous level 20 character. Get to the Capra Demon. Steamroll. He should have got gud. Get to Sen’s Fortress. AAAAAAAGGGHHHHHHH. Ornstein & Smough. Steamroll. Stuck on the fucking Four Kings of all bosses. Go beat Seath, get my OP magic from Logan, game over.

    I beat Gwyn with 2 casts of Dark Bead, rekindle the First Flame, and immediately start a new playthrough.

    I’m hooked.