There is this beautiful woman at my local Walmart who recognises me; she always smiles and waves at me. She usually works at the service desk and, from across the room, said, “How are you doing?” Now I’m aware retail workers are nice to customers because they have to be, but I still decided to shoot my shot. While no one was at the service area, she said, “Do you need help with something?” I was nervous and asked her name. She told me. I asked her how her Christmas was, and she said, “Good.” It was clear she didn’t want to have a conversation, so I just said, “I just wanted to say hi,” and left.
I’m aware of body language, and I take rejection well, so I just left.
But yeah, I’ve never asked out or dated a retail worker. I’m aware that just because someone is friendly with you doesn’t mean they like you, but I still wanted to shoot my shot.
Note to self: never ask out or date a retail worker.
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It’s okay to date a retail worker.
Just don’t ask them out while they’re on the job.
It’s their job to be nice to you and it’s far too easy to misread someone’s customer service politeness as interest, especially if you are socially starved or touch-starved.
Don’t make it awkward.
If you go to a Walmart, Target or any store regularly, EVEN if you are acquainted with some of the employees, it’s impossible to ask them out in general. Even if we take romance out of it and just want a friend, it’s damn near impossible.
Because getting close to a customer from a professional perspective is a massive risk. Most people in those types of jobs can’t afford to misread someone’s advances and risk losing their job over it.
If you are acquainted with them, why not shoot them a text to hang out?
That’s a US thing. In Europe, it’s fine. Retail workers aren’t forced to be nice to you and can easily tell you to fuck off if they want. They aren’t slaves to the general public.
Seconded. I met a partner of 4 years while they were working at a local market.
As I lived about 100 meters from the market, I did most of my shopping there and would be there every other day. We slowly got to chatting as they started to recognise me and one day, as I walked in, they were at the register with another customer and I waved a silent “hello” and noticed they blushed as they waved back.
Asked them if they wanted to grab a coffee sometime and got the quickest yes of my life.
Sadly we had to move to different cities and amicably ended the relationship after those 4 years.
This is definitely one of the advantages of living in Europe - stores can be right beside the apartment thanks to mixed use development. I had flat mates who went to the store every day because it was just 100m from the apartment. They got to know the retail workers, store owners, waiters, and so on. We had bar maids and bar men in the flat, we would encounter retail workers in local bars after shop close, talk to them while shopping, and so on. Asking them on a date wasn’t a problem - we were all adults and rejections did happen.
Sounds like you basically did the right thing here. I’m sure everyone appreciated you reading the room.
How much spaghetti was in your pockets?
Just the regulation amount, I’d assume.
Always bring extra for a lady
Follow us for more life pro tips.
Nah, I’m following for the stray spaghetti. om nom nom.
It makes sense. She doesn’t really know you, and first dates are unfortunately a risk for many women, to the point where they often have an escape plan for if and when a guy ends up being creepy. If you did end up being a creeper - I’m not saying you are, but she doesn’t know - she wouldn’t want to have to deal with you knowing exactly where she is 5 days out of the week. Even if she was attracted to you, I can see the reasoning for not wanting to take that risk. First dates are safer either with people you already know pretty well, or with people who are such strangers that you can completely cut all interactions with them if things go south.
Asking someone out is about being aware of the situation and taking in social cues.
Retail workers are required to be nice to you. But some may go above and beyond. If they do, they may be hitting on you. (E.g. you ask for a small coffee and they give you a large. Or don’t charge you for an extra whatever.)
The key is making sure you aren’t a creep. Make sure the interaction is welcome and you aren’t making their job harder.
It sounds like you read the room and opted to not shoot your shot. That’s the way.
It sounds like you and her don’t know anything about each other, aside from you finding her physically attractive.
