What the fuck is this. Is this a threat?
Seriously, does ICE just shows up and is my entire family gonna bandwagon and blame me for it?
Like sure, whatever, go call them mom, they’ll shoot all of us.
What the fuck is this. Is this a threat?
Seriously, does ICE just shows up and is my entire family gonna bandwagon and blame me for it?
Like sure, whatever, go call them mom, they’ll shoot all of us.
Jesus Christ wtf
Not really that insane when you know the context of what my family is like… I got so used to it, I’m only posting here cuz I need an outlet to vent
To give you a glimpse: mom is pressuring my older brother, who is still living with us btw, to marry because he’s “getting too old” and mom’s afraid he would be “alone for the rest of his life”… he’s 28… for context my dad got married when he was like 31 and mom was 24… arranged marriage… soon after marriage, they gave birth to my older brother then 5 years after that they had me…
I wonder if my mom was even happy being pressured in a marriage at 24… jeez wtf… she probably hate her children… she probably feel like she has no control and wants to control us… :/ that’s my theory anyways
father seems so… indifferent to us… like he’s not even abusive at all… he doesn’t seem to care too much emotionally, only care in the sense of like… social expectations for a father to care about their children… I remember like he was always reading newspapers or after phones became a thing, just scrolling wechat… doesn’t seem to care about me too much…
so sad… my life is just in black and white… idk why colors literally feel duller these recent years
That one has become accustomed to the abuse does not make it okay. That someone has been abused or in a bad situation does not exclude them from becoming abusers/abusive themselves (oft quite the contrary, it’s the seed of how they became so, maladapting to it).
I wonder how well that mother would do when measured against all of Elizabeth Shaw’s stuff about how to spot a narcissist.
And then there’s the perspective of control dramas… sounding like a bit of an Intimidator mother and Aloof father. Once connected to source, these can become a beneficent Leader and Thinker, their more positive counterpart expressions. Watch for Interogator and Poor-me cross challenges for energy. Better to find the flow.
[PS, “colors literally feel duller” is a strong sign of energy deficit from a lot of energy control dramas, parasiting of each other, unconsciously ~ at least as from the control dramas perspective. Stressors drain us and cause maladies, whether the stressors are emotional, chemical or physical, and the contrary is true too, that each area can be tended to more, to help adapt and compensate for whichever greater stressor load of the other type(s), at least, to some extent.].
That context doesn’t change the reality. It is abuse. It’s normalized for you but it’s still not abused.
Being able to use critical thinking skills to predict where the abuse might stem from is good, it means you haven’t internalized it.
You are depressed and need to speak to a therapist, internet stranger or whatever. The important part is it needs to be someone that is not close to your family so they can offer an honest assessment of your situation as you experience it.
From there you can build up what you’ve already established and gain a solid perspective of the situation and from there create a plan to remove yourself from the situation and begin healing.
I’m sorry man :(
I hope you get the strength to hold it together until you can escape this abusive situation and be independent.
I relate to a lot of what you post about immigration, not belonging anywhere, but my family is thankfully supportive. If you wanna talk my PMs are open.