So… I got my diver’s license as soon as I turned 18. It was a very stressful period of my life, and I hated everything about driving. They promised me freedom, but I got shackled.

Passing the exam as a nightmare (took me 3 attempts) and even during the lessons the professor saw how horribly tense I was. I got sick just by thinking about the car.

Once I passed, my family decided that I’d get over my fears by forcing me to drive, every single day, for weeks, with the whole family in the car, yelling, mocking me…

I had several panic attacks that were dismissed as lack of maturity, and I stopped driving. It’s been years.

But now I’m going to have to get better at this due to circumstances, and I’m scared.

I feel that I can’t focus on all the elements of the road, I have a very hard time calculating distances because I’m very short (edit: 1’50m, if that is relevant) and barely see above the wheel, I have to move the seat so close to the wheel that I fear that if one day the airbag jumps, I’ll suffocate. My blind spots seem infinite.

My car is automatic, so no stick to worry about.

If you have read all I wrote, I’ll greatly appreciate any advice or encouragement. Thank you

  • altasshet@lemmy.ca
    9·
    2 days ago

    Not really the same situation, but I got my driver’s license at 43 years old. Leading up to me taking lessons, I was overthinking the whole process. So a few thoughts from that angle for the driving itself:

    • take some refresher lessons with an instructor. For me it was reassuring to have a professional in the car. That should help you with the distance calculation bit.
    • when you start driving on your own, try to avoid high stress situations. Like, avoid rush hour, take short trips on routes your familiar with.
    • somewhat the opposite, but not really: take a road trip. Go somewhere quiet, into the country side. Gain familiarity and confidence.
    • as you get more used to it, you’ll find that it becomes more and more normal and less stressful.
    • drive defensively. Leave space. If others butt in, let them and give them space.

    For some other points you mentioned:

    • get a cushion to raise you up if you can’t adjust the seat height. I am average height and did that to get better visibility.
    • blind spots are also car dependent. Are you tired to a specific car, or can you shop around, maybe for something smaller?