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Stainless steel hog roaster.
It can roast a human.
Look at this human. He could be roasted. Where is he? Don’t ask questions. Look.
Come eat hog. Roasted hog. Very long roasted hog. Come alone.
Thou shalt not poorly crop the Christ!
I can see lots of stains on that steel.
That’s patina. Very desirable to collectors.
So it will work on a pig. what about them ICE cunts?
No crank? This is useless.
Can’t crank your hog?
Plus you get to cosplay as a Silent Hill 2 boss.
Does it come with the tarp?
What about a can of corn?
I saw a porno decades ago where a 400 pound Greek god of a man, sweat streaking off his rotund belly, was pounding into this petite woman who was reluctantly engaged in coitus with the monstrosity.
the camera gets closer and you see the sweat rolling down his belly and dripping between them isn’t just sweat.
this mustachioed golden brown god is literally drinking a can of creamed corn, and poorly at that. bits of corn and corn juice roll down his stubbly chin and drips obscenely onto his chest. it continues to trail down, finally disappearing from view under his overhanging belly and her small boney posterior. the final resting place for those kernels lead the imagination to feel filthy and disgusted with oneself.
between the tears, running mascara, creamed corn, and his grotesque form, it was like witnessing a living Renaissance painting.
it was perfect.
sigh…
unzips
I didn’t want to read that but I did anyway and I violently regret it. It was glorious.
For the pig hog in your life.
Demonstrated here by Giles Corey.
