Asking because I remember telling my mom I wanna kms and she got upset and told me she regret giving birth to me.
Later when confronted, she told me she only said it because she was angry, that she didn’t mean it.
Nowadays she tells me she loves me (I mean she always told me she loved me, but then there are a lot of memories of me getting yelled at… so idk… wtf), that everyone in my family loves me (really mom? pretty sure my brother hates me to death).
Bipolar much?
(Pls don’t spam comments with “see a therapist”, working on it… healthcare system sucks to navigate)
I’ve hardly ever said anything I “didn’t mean” in anger, but I wish I was better at knowing when they get the point. Sometimes I feel like they don’t really get it unless I drive the point home to a crazy degree, but when I go one bit too far it fucking sucks and I hate myself.