WASHINGTON D.C. - US President Donald Trump's planned White House ballroom, requiring the complete demolition of the historic East Wing, is being criticized by Canadians who will now never get to light the building on fire for a second time since the War of 1812.

US President Donald Trump’s planned White House ballroom, requiring the complete demolition of the historic East Wing, is being criticized by Canadians who will now never get to torch building for a second time since the War of 1812.

“With the way US/Canadian trade negotiations are going, it’s inevitable that we’re going to end up in a place of asymmetric guerrilla warfare,” explained Prime Minister Mark Carney. “We Canadians were definitely looking forward to another crack at burning down their president’s residence – yet another thing that Trump has stolen from us.” […]