Donald Trump has once again been cruelly snubbed by the Nobel Peace Prize committee, despite what he insists was an “incredible” year of personal achievements in the field of “peace, which is very strong right now, the strongest peace anyone’s ever seen.”

The committee shocked the world by awarding the prize to someone who had not, in fact, threatened to annex Greenland after mistaking it for a golf resort, nor suggested using the US military to disperse protesters exercising their constitutional right to free speech.

“We had to draw a line somewhere,” explained one weary member of the Nobel committee. “Traditionally, the Peace Prize goes to people who promote peace, not to people who deploy tear gas so they can wave at a Bible.” […]

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