I thought that I was the same as you, but actually I realise I ‘tell myself’ things all the time.
Mostly it feels like I’m bullshitting myself with things I ‘know to be true’ to drown out irrational things I feel.
Do you never have irrational monkeybrain chatter? Like, “I don’t feel like I’m ever going to be good at X”; only to reassure yourself that you’ll get better as you practice? If I ever feel disheartened, I often ‘tell myself’ that I’m not special enough to be uniquely incapable of learning whatever it is.
I put ‘tell myself’ in quotes because none of this actually happens in slow full language sentences in my head. It can, but bothering to sound out the whole thought seems silly and inefficient somehow. Mostly it happens in fragmented feelings and flashes of remembered sensations.
I thought that I was the same as you, but actually I realise I ‘tell myself’ things all the time.
Mostly it feels like I’m bullshitting myself with things I ‘know to be true’ to drown out irrational things I feel.
Do you never have irrational monkeybrain chatter? Like, “I don’t feel like I’m ever going to be good at X”; only to reassure yourself that you’ll get better as you practice? If I ever feel disheartened, I often ‘tell myself’ that I’m not special enough to be uniquely incapable of learning whatever it is.
I put ‘tell myself’ in quotes because none of this actually happens in slow full language sentences in my head. It can, but bothering to sound out the whole thought seems silly and inefficient somehow. Mostly it happens in fragmented feelings and flashes of remembered sensations.