Look, if I were in a privileged position in life, you can bet I’d also do whatever I could to make the same true for my daughters. 100%. I care for them and want them to be prosperous, and if they have kids I’d like them to be in a good position too.
But what really fucks me off is when these people who’ve benefitted from that then go on to act like they’re self-made and didn’t get the help.
Just own it. Say “yeah, my family runs a businesses, and because of that I’m in this good position. I’m really thankful of my parents for doing that for me, I’ve been really fortunate, and I work hard every day in order to show my appreciation for the opportunities that have been made available to me.”
I’d respect the hell out of that, even though there’s still the degree of nepotism there.
The reason they don’t admit that they got a head start is that they actually don’t believe it.
The daughter of a family friend of mine grew up middle class. Her mom was a social worker, her did had an office job. She managed to marry a man who’s the son that’s inheriting his dad’s oil business, worth tens of millions. She is now a housewife / stay at home mom. She now has a city home, a cottage (which is fully a house, just in a more rural location) and a summer home. One of her daughters competes in sailing races (and anybody who knows sailing knows just how expensive that hobby can be), the other is into horse riding.
I’ve asked her what it’s like for her kids to grow up rich, and she doesn’t get it. She doesn’t think she’s rich. She says that there are houses around where she lives that are even bigger than hers, and that her husband works hard. I’m sure that’s true, but she’s still in the top 0.1%. And this is someone who grew up middle class, and should remember what it was like.
I guarantee that most of the kids that come from rich families have no idea what it’s like not to be rich. As a result, they don’t ever consider that it might not be normal to be able to have your dad’s lawyer look over the contracts for your new company free of charge. They never think of how easy they had it to find investors for their company, and how forgiving those investors were. It never occurred to them that during those lean months at the beginning when their company hadn’t yet started generating real revenue, that it was unusual to be able to live in their parents’ spare apartment in the city, and to have dad pay off their credit card.
I feel i came from a middle class but relatively well do family, dad had enough so we never had to skip meals or skip new clothes every year.
But I also got luckyt young in my age (from age 12 to 17). I regularly interacted with people who were poor, underprivileged and ubdereducated.
I saw parents giving their 1 year old some hash just to stop them from crying, I mean what chance that kid has to ever be sober.
I saw a grown man who aas extremely happy when I gave away my 3 year old t shirt that i thought i got so bored with.
I saw daily labour markets where I’ve seen grown man cry because they didn’t get picked for that day and he doesn’t know how he is going to be feeding his family tonight.
I saw how being poor was a trap, I remember I saw this day laborer buy 10ml of oil, 200g of rice, 100g of beans at exorbitant markups (50-70% compared to if he bought standard 1kg packs) . And I was like this man is stupid for not buying bulk and my dad explained, he has to go hungry for a week before he can save up enough to buy bulk and he’d much rather not go hungry.
Anyway my point being, I am always aware lucky and privileged I am. all parents should make good faith effort to show their kids how people below them in wheel of luck live, and not as a cautionary tale like an exhibit. But put them in situations where they can see the actual good people behind the poor, underprivileged and ubdereducated label. Otherwise kids only know their lifestyle and think that’s normal.
I guarantee that most of the kids that come from rich families have no idea what it’s like not to be rich. As a result, they don’t ever consider that it might not be normal to be able to have your dad’s lawyer look over the contracts for your new company free of charge. They never think of how easy they had it to find investors for their company, and how forgiving those investors were. It never occurred to them that during those lean months at the beginning when their company hadn’t yet started generating real revenue, that it was unusual to be able to live in their parents’ spare apartment in the city, and to have dad pay off their credit card.
Look, if I were in a privileged position in life, you can bet I’d also do whatever I could to make the same true for my daughters. 100%. I care for them and want them to be prosperous, and if they have kids I’d like them to be in a good position too.
But what really fucks me off is when these people who’ve benefitted from that then go on to act like they’re self-made and didn’t get the help.
Just own it. Say “yeah, my family runs a businesses, and because of that I’m in this good position. I’m really thankful of my parents for doing that for me, I’ve been really fortunate, and I work hard every day in order to show my appreciation for the opportunities that have been made available to me.”
I’d respect the hell out of that, even though there’s still the degree of nepotism there.
The reason they don’t admit that they got a head start is that they actually don’t believe it.
The daughter of a family friend of mine grew up middle class. Her mom was a social worker, her did had an office job. She managed to marry a man who’s the son that’s inheriting his dad’s oil business, worth tens of millions. She is now a housewife / stay at home mom. She now has a city home, a cottage (which is fully a house, just in a more rural location) and a summer home. One of her daughters competes in sailing races (and anybody who knows sailing knows just how expensive that hobby can be), the other is into horse riding.
I’ve asked her what it’s like for her kids to grow up rich, and she doesn’t get it. She doesn’t think she’s rich. She says that there are houses around where she lives that are even bigger than hers, and that her husband works hard. I’m sure that’s true, but she’s still in the top 0.1%. And this is someone who grew up middle class, and should remember what it was like.
I guarantee that most of the kids that come from rich families have no idea what it’s like not to be rich. As a result, they don’t ever consider that it might not be normal to be able to have your dad’s lawyer look over the contracts for your new company free of charge. They never think of how easy they had it to find investors for their company, and how forgiving those investors were. It never occurred to them that during those lean months at the beginning when their company hadn’t yet started generating real revenue, that it was unusual to be able to live in their parents’ spare apartment in the city, and to have dad pay off their credit card.
I feel i came from a middle class but relatively well do family, dad had enough so we never had to skip meals or skip new clothes every year.
But I also got luckyt young in my age (from age 12 to 17). I regularly interacted with people who were poor, underprivileged and ubdereducated.
I saw parents giving their 1 year old some hash just to stop them from crying, I mean what chance that kid has to ever be sober.
I saw a grown man who aas extremely happy when I gave away my 3 year old t shirt that i thought i got so bored with.
I saw daily labour markets where I’ve seen grown man cry because they didn’t get picked for that day and he doesn’t know how he is going to be feeding his family tonight.
I saw how being poor was a trap, I remember I saw this day laborer buy 10ml of oil, 200g of rice, 100g of beans at exorbitant markups (50-70% compared to if he bought standard 1kg packs) . And I was like this man is stupid for not buying bulk and my dad explained, he has to go hungry for a week before he can save up enough to buy bulk and he’d much rather not go hungry.
Anyway my point being, I am always aware lucky and privileged I am. all parents should make good faith effort to show their kids how people below them in wheel of luck live, and not as a cautionary tale like an exhibit. But put them in situations where they can see the actual good people behind the poor, underprivileged and ubdereducated label. Otherwise kids only know their lifestyle and think that’s normal.
Honestly you don’t need your family to be rich. A family well-off enough to give you:
Makes a HUGE difference.
I’m sorry but that is called rich these days.
That’s…
That’s literally middle class…
What middle class
Yep. Like [email protected] said at the end of their reply:
My family ran a business…into the ground, because my father could not sit still, and went off to do whatever work.
Claims he is perfectly healthy, is outraged when I mention ADHD.
ADHD can be perfectly healthy.
It just takes some skill to ride that wild bull.