You’re not alone. I had a hard time taking my inhalers daily once my benefits started covering them, because they were so expensive I used to ration them for when I really “needed” it.

I’ve been dying to take a vacation for years, but we carry some debt on our line of credit from a renovation we did summer before last, and my husband is so anti-debt from how his parents struggled that we gotta get that to 0 before he’ll be comfortable spending on a vacation, even though realistically we are financially ok.

Macbooks particularly are one of the stupidest shit someone can burn money on, the extreme high price and low performance make apple computers literally the worse in the market.

For the price of a powerful computer with RTX and all, you get an useless office computer where the keyboard is even too shit to do any office work on it.

As for the actual question, I tend to spend money that I shouldn’t on premium audio gear, I should feel bad about it, but I really enjoy listening to good audio and for me I feel it’s worth it even if I have to postpone things that for most people are considered essential.

Also, it’s very hard for me to spend money on (new) computers and camera gear. I terribly need a new computer with a good GPU for 3D modeling and a decent camera. However if I buy a new computer or camera in 10 years it will be obsolete and worth 10x less than I paid for it meanwhile stuff like audio gear or musical instruments don’t become obsolete so I’m more likely to spend money on yet another paid of headphones that I don’t need than saving up for a computer.

I’m at a point in life where I’ve got most things that I need, so there’s not a whole lot frivolous spending to for me to do. When time allows and I have some extra money, I get another flight lesson logged. And once in a while I order another batch of electronics from digikey. Beyond that I mostly put money into upgrading the hundred year old house I live in.

EDIT: And an obscene amount of PETG for 3D printing. But I feel that at this stage that’s almost like groceries at this point, as most of what I print is functional/useful stuff.

I have a 6 week wishlist for most smaller stuff, to avoid impulse buying. More like 6 months for something like a computer and 6 years for something like a home renovation.

I think if you’ve waited so long and still want the same thing it’s safe to say you really want it and will enjoy it.

Oh - another thing you can do - we have a savings account but also a “goal savings account” that is for things like this, specific items that cost sort of a lot (or a whole lot, for years now it’s been saving for a car for my husband.) Save the money away from the regular accounts so it is your extra money.

I think the general question you always need to ask when buying something “nonessential” is: will I use this enough to justify the cost?”

Whether that’s a MacBook or a car or a gaming console or even a $0.99 app.

Just be honest with yourself. I once bought a MacBook Pro because I decided I was going to develop iPhone apps. I never learned Objective C. I barely used the laptop at all. It was a waste of money, plus stressing over the guilt of never using it.

Flip side: you only live once. Don’t trap yourself in a mindset that you always need to save every penny and never enjoy yourself with small things.

Everyone exists somewhere in the spectrum between saving and spending. Figure out where you live on that spectrum and make your purchasing decisions accordingly.

I’m really bad at spending stuff on myself also. I like prioritising paying back loans, buying stock and so on since it pays itself back later on.

The way I look at it is that the less I spend on luxuries the less I have to work (currently and in retirement) so I don’t feel weird about it.

Another rule of thumb is to delay purchases by 3 months and it doesn’t set back your financial goals. If you’ve been wanting this Macbook now for 3 months and you have the money for it and you feel comfortable with your current financial situation I’d tell you to get it. If it’s an expensive car it’s a financial catastrophy usually so don’t get it even if you’ve wanted it for 3 months.

No idea if that helps but don’t feel weird about being frugal. Frugality is incredibly useful and can set you up for an easy life.

I do a lot of budgeting, and I use the “pool” method.

A lot of people recommend the 50-30-20 rule: 50% of your money goes to fixed expenses, 30% goes to discretionary spending, and 20% to savings.

I tweaked that a bit and made it 60-20-30, with the 60% being for essentials…things like clothing is included.

That 20% goes towards any guilt-free spending. I’ve covered everything I need, and this is money I’m allowed to spend on whatever I want…guilt-free.

First, it is better for you that your natural instinct as you’ve gotten wealthier is to still maintain your cheap habits. It is better for your finances to spend under your means than over them.

But now, you can start looking into more than just cash flow to justify the,cost. Your time has value now, so you should consider the time value when making financial decisions. You should also look at things like total life cycle cost; a MacBook is generally well built and is on the higher end of life.

I would also start to set financial goals. If you have an idea of what you want financially in your life, it can help you decide if you have the money to splurge on some essentials.

With that first and last paragraph, in addition to your question, it sounds like you don’t have the confidence to decide this purchase on your own.

Whereas spending money on car stuff, emergency funds or your parents must have been generally approved by whoever you fear consequences from. (looks like your father (or parents?) when you were a child)

You can obv. just go ahead and buy that MacBook, as a form of exposure therapy. Buy it, accept the potential fallout from that action and come out the other side with a MacBook.

If even small luxuries, like a small figurine make you anxious, you could search for something small you like and buy that first and ‘work your way up’.

Alternatively you need to do the deep soul searching and process all those emotions around spending and saving money. Which future does your fear try to save you from? What happens to you, or your family, when you spend that money? Why do you budget (emotionally)? Why is spending money on family (luxuries?) ok? When is it not? What does a MacBook represent to you?

As far as MacBooks go, it’s easy for me. Every Mac I’ve owned has outlasted Windows/Linux PCs to the point of being the more frugal option if the upfront cost is affordable.

That doesn’t take into account whether you need Windows specific software—mostly games and some technical, industry specific software. Sometimes Wine/Crossover or virtualization is an option.

That said, balance your necessities, your emergency fund, your retirement fund. If those are reasonably covered, you’re in the position for a big spend especially on something durable that also makes life easier.

MacBooks are easy. Buy it.

Don’t like it? You can easily sell it for 70-80% retail in a year

I impulse bought a MacBook Air a couple months ago because it was a great deal and my old Mac I still use is a 2011 MacBook Pro. I then had a longish hospital stay and used my new air 24 hours a day for a week and a half. It saved my life, I love it so much.

At home now I’m still mostly on my W10 or Linux desktops, but I bust the air out still to text people with a full keyboard or just have another machine handy to look things up. I hope I can keep it for as long as my 2011 MBP!

If I need it and it’s worth the price then I don’t worry about spending money on it. Especially when talking about one time or long term purchases such as a laptop (which as an extremely satisfied MacBook user I highly recommend)

Subscribtion services and meals are the ones I take issue with. I dont want to pay high price for something and then have nothing to show for it. I will not pay 5 euros for a cup of coffee no matter what - it’s not worth that to me. With items you technically didn’t lose any value - you just traded cash for an object.

I have a similar childhood history. One thing that works for me is comparing what the daily use cost for the thing is. Like with a laptop, it may cost $2k, and I may use it almost every day for 5 years, which comes out to a little over one dollar a day which is not too expensive. However, something like a pair of binoculars that may cost like $500, but I only use them 4 times a year for 5 years would be $25 per day that I use them even though they cost 1/4 as much as the laptop.

Also with the laptop, if you use it every day, going from a $1k laptop with a daily use cost of $0.50 a day to $1.00 a day is not a major jump in total daily cost, so going for a more expensive laptop that is going to make your daily experience better may be worth it, whereas going for binoculars that cost twice as much would cost $25 more per use, which is a much more significant dollar amount per use.

Another way to assess the laptop price it is to compare everything else that costs you $1 a day. You may even be able to cut out $1 a day from your budget. Like if you live in a cold climate, just don’t warm up your car as long every day. Or buy a small size food thing instead of a large. Or skip eating out one day every two weeks.

I’m sure some folks will disagree with this though process, but it has worked for me, and has helped me assess the value of things in my life that I may not give much thought to because they are not glamorous, like a mattress.

I’m the same. We’re remodeling a house and when i see the price of an item i do hours and hours of research trying to save a few bucks, which delays everything. We began remodeling Jan 6. Could be done by now if i were less wishy washy.