I’m probably just an asshole nobody wants to talk to, but I can hardly even get a reply text from anyone anymore. A couple people have told me that they are just feeling burnt out/depressed/etc and don’t have even enough energy to answer a message anymore. But I’ve also had some long time friends just entirely ghost me in the last year as well with no explanation. It feels like I’m surrounded by NPCs. I’ve basically just stopped reaching out to anyone at this point. Outside of my work, literally the only people I talk to are my parents, sister, and my girlfriend. Everyone else seems dead inside. I used to have at least 10 people who I could call on a moments notice and all of those people are gone.
I am 31
Bingo. I’m 40. This dissolving social life issue is exactly what I went through after I turned 30.
It’s two things. One, from this point on your social life needs to be actively managed and maintained. When you’re younger, life’s circumstances do that for you. From here on out, it’s all has to be the result of your own effort.
And two, to do that you will need to work on yourself. The rails your life is on when you’re younger often mask and excaccerbate personal issues which, absent those rails, come out to others as toxicity you may be blind to. I say this without irony, find a good therapist and dig into your problems. Learn more about yourself and your past. Find a physical activity you enjoy and exercise daily. Improve your diet. If you have the means, go to all your medical appointments regularly.
It’s scary because it all has to be actively managed from here on out. But once you get a hold of it again (After getting ahold of yourself) it’s that much more actualizing as it’s an intentional social life of your own creation. Perhaps a smaller sphere than before, but just as meaningful if not more. It will take time, maybe a year or two. But you’ve got an upward trajectory in front of you.
are your friends marrying/having kids?
No, none of them are to be honest, and I don’t think any of them have girlfriends either. Think lemmy type people. Lol