Spoiler
He was dead all along
spoiler
There were never any WMD’s.
spoiler
His wife’s killer was already dead
When I was a teenager, I was seeing X-Men 3 in theaters. A man comes in late and sits next to me. He points at Jean Grey and asks:
Spoiler
“Did she kill the professor yet?”
And, the answer was, no, that did not happen yet. 😤
I trolled some random kid in the theater by telling them DJ was Rey’s father, which he isn’t
That spoiler does happen in X3 though lol. But I remember telling some young relatives that Kylo Ren was Luke Skywalker after Force Awakens came out. He was despondent. I really regretted making the joke. Like he was just straight up laying on the floor staring at the ceiling. I thought it was obvious he wasn’t Luke so I thought it was a funny thing to say.
On my way out of TLJ, I considered shouting “REY TURNS TO THE DARK SIDE!”
My wife has a joke about The Universal Spoiler, which is “They die”. Apparently it applies to a lot of movies in one way or another.
I have a similar joke but it’s the good guys win.
spoiler
he dies
Spoiler
The bank robbers escaped by releasing themselves to the police and saying they were hostages.
Spoiler
It was the dog
spoiler
The butler did it
The dude does or doesn’t get the girl
