[orange, looking weary, while pink looks on] Mate… Why would you say you’re hetero, the person you’re dating used to be a dude, that makes you gay
[green, holding hands with pinkblue] The person you’re dating used to be a kid, so… you’re a pedophile?
[orange looks pissed]
[green shrugs smugly]
Honest question… cis person of whatever preference dates trans person of whatever gender… Is that not always identified as two queer people in a queer relationship? E. G., if a cis straight presenting guy dates a trans woman, for their first time, stepping out of norms, are they not learning they’re queer?
I’ve thought the same about swingers, enm, etc that are otherwise straight cis couples… they’re literally “queer” per se in that they are atypical or non-normative.
Please inform me either academically or practically, I’d appreciate either.
Queer is a reclaimed umbrella term for any non-cis or non-hetero relationship. If two men were in a relationship they might consider themselves queer. It’s not really a word you’d ascribe to other people, it’s self-descriptive.
A man and woman in a relationship is a hetero relationship, if one or both are trans or gender non-confirming they may consider themselves queer. It’s with noting that a hetero relationship does not necessarily mean they’re straight either, bi or pan people often date the opposite gender.
I wouldn’t normally consider a non-monogamous relationship queer by default, otherwise anyone who cheats would be queer.
Since it’s a reclaimed slur the best move is to not use it at all unless the person you’re talking about has made it clear they’re comfortable being described that way by you.
At least if she’s had surgery and also simply looks like a woman, I don’t see how it’s even stepping out of norms