Transcription
A Twitter post from Matt @mattxiv with a text that reads “sometimes when i’m bored i wander into the weird parts of etsy to see what straight people are up to.” The picture below shows a hand holding a keychain with a penis-shaped cutout that says “Thanks for not pulling out!” There are 3 sperm-shaped cutouts attached with the names Ryver, Brynlee, and Emersyn.
It makes more sense as a Father’s Day gift, where the kids are thanking him for not pulling out. (Which is not birth control.)
But then it’s even more disgusting.
And oh god the names of the kids.
The letter Y is sometimes a consonant, and sometimes a vowel, so they probably got a good deal on them. Or we’ve found the Time Travelers, and they were most recently in Maedeval Englynd. I have no better explanations. Also, pulling out is NOT birth control.