Show transcript
Screenshot of a Tumblr post by txttletale:
there are two countries. USA, and Europe. and everyine who says anything about the USA, that isb ad, is a Europeman. you use Celsius? congratulations. youre from Europe (the country)(European). you dont .ike Eat Delicious Jimmy’s Regional Hamburger Chain? okay Europe guy. youre not Joe Biden president? well then youre Privileged to have EuropePresident (the president of Europe) (Boris Johnson? ithink) so shut up about our American politics you ()Europe) (the only other place in the world) would never undrestanding, rthat in America, we have regional subdivisions and local dialects(you dont have those in Europe)(the other coutnry there is)(iuts just one coutnry basically and america is like 50 countries in a trenchoat did you know that?). and so. Youre not allowed to be mean to me or hamburger every again :/
Can I buy some whitespace?
Whitespace is European propaganda. Don’t fall for their deceptions.
Fiindcă există doar o limbă în Europa, dacă vorbesc așa, toate persoanale, excluzând americanii, o să mă inteleagă.
As an American living in Germany: I won’t say any of that if you please just stop joking about school shootings to me in every context.
A) I’m clearly okay living in a scenario where guns are more restricted, and
B) I’m from not too far away from sandy hook (elementary school, 2012, ~25 kids and teachers died, the first one Alex jones convinced people was fake), and know multiple families who lost a child to it- your edgy joke just brought them to mind at eight am at work. It’s fucking tragic and I can’t laugh about it- the only reason you can is that it’s not real to you.
I remember living in France during a movie theatre shooting, and they were like “how do you live like that? It must be horrible”. It was also like 2k miles away from anywhere I’d ever been
Meanwhile, in the few months I was there someone decapitated a clerk in the nearest post office (just walked in during working hours) and my host found a human torso in the park like a mile away
That is awful, but you know what they say: fight fire with fire and start joking back about the Cologne School massacre.
how the fuck does that help
Oh it absolutely doesn’t, it’s just as tasteless and out of line.
“Self-care didn’t work, so I’m trying others-harm”
“This traumatic thing happened in my life and I wish people wouldn’t joke about it”
“Wow that sucks here’s a joke about it”
Why? to what end?
Wait, so people IRL find out you’re American and start making school shooting jokes at you? I thought I was supposed to have bad social skills.
Yeah. To be totally fair, it’s not a lot of people percentage wise, but it’s a lot of jokes for me to experience because I work at a busy bakery, and chat with easily a hundred people in a shift. I probably get ~10 casual jokes about mass shootings in a week, most of which are about schools, but not all.
It happens more in social gatherings like larger parties or when playing with strangers at a game store, but I can push back more there, so it’s not as bothersome.
I really struggle to imagine how that comes up at a bakery of all places. Like how does the conversation even goes there? And what are the “jokes”? I can maybe picture making a remark like “oh you’re American? Moved here to escape mass shootings?” or something but even that is so out of place at the bakery, I’m just there to pick up bread, the most I’d chat about even in France where we love to chat is like the weather or whatever, no way I’m gonna start talking about deeper topics or the baker’s life story and stuff.
Various ways, really. People ask me to please not shoot up the university here; they say that I’m probably used to [the sound of a car backfiring] because I went to school in the US; they remark that kids these days are impolite, but at least they don’t shoot up schools like where I’m from; they ask if my backpack is bulletproof.
The “50 countries in a trenchcoat” thing is so stupid.
No other country in the entire world does federalism apparently.
most of the time i hear about it, it’s not even that, it’s about the US’s internal variety, as in the variety of dialects, culture and the such
which is very funny because for a country of it’s size and population, the US (white, colonial) culture is shockingly homogenous. even england, just england, has more internal variety! and that’s not even mentioning countries like india or china
the claim that the US has a ton of cultural variation would make sense if we were talking about Indigenous people and diaspora communities. but it’s never about them, strangely, it’s always about how north texalifornia says scrimble and west massachuvania says jonkle…
There’s more variety in language in the freaking Basque country, a subregion of France and Spain. We have our own language with 7 variations, inside those there’s major sub variations from town to town, and then we have all the other Spanish and French languages.
They speak of differences between states when their states are the size of countries, and inner state variance is minimal. Compare Texas to Spain, we have several regions with wild cultural and language differences…
It’s laughable.
You think Texas is homogenous?
Not as diverse as Spain lol.
It’s a common refrain that the United States geographically is one of the most heterogeneous places in the world, but we way we build our cities and towns and how we choose to operate as an overall society is super homogenous.
Although I disagree with the notion that there isn’t diversity within the US (some states may be less diverse than others however), there is a degree of truth that we tend to have the same people doing the same things from Alaska to Florida. That’s not to say there aren’t tweaks to the system depending on what the populations want (Compare California’s government policies to North Dakotas for example), but we have sort of accepted a homogeneous lifestyle as the way to do things, for better or worse.
There are 3 major places in the US. Cities, Suburbia and the countryside. Possible 4th is small towns/college towns, though suburbia is always trying to absorb them if there are jobs to be had (or at least real estate value to be extracted).
Gentrification is also how suburbia tries to take over cities it’s not afraid of, or that it can’t ignore the all that value it wants to extract.
Suburbia is what most people see most of America as. Right wing media see it that way too and cast anything else as dangerous, especially cities that haven’t largely gentrified. They
My point is that you are stating differences between states, when your states are country sized. We have differences between regions in the country itself, wilder differences that yo have in your whole ass country.
There ought to be some differences in a country the size of 5 countries. What shocks us is how little differences there are.
Well, the US is about 250 years old as a society. How old is your country bud?
Less than 200 years old. And we have 3 languages, a huge cultural divide between the north and south, and more diversity in our provinces than in between us states.
What country?
Belgium. The current country was founded in 1830. We have Wallonia and Flanders who speak different languages, each province has or had its own dialect but it has merged mainly into french and dutch, with a bit of German in the east. The country itself is probably smaller than any us state, but I don’t know all the sizes of them.
Funnily enough, there is a small town in the US with Belgian immigrants that still speak older dialects of Walloon.
I mean, then don’t go saying that it’s very diverse? Idk.
Spain is about a thousands older, my region even more.
Do me a favor and look up the Diversity Index of the US, France, and Spain. It’s literally a measure of how diverse a group is. Tell me which scores higher - the highest score would be the ‘most diverse’ by definition.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_ethnic_and_cultural_diversity_level
Funny enough, Spain and the US are both almost 0.5 by the looks of that chart. Most of Europe are way less diverse. Holland, Greece, and Switzerland not withstanding, though I bet if you use income diversity, Switzerland turns navy blue.
Yep,
And things like Reservations are also always conveniently left out of debates about the electoral college and states representation in the US senate. Like, I’d like to hear them advocate for representation for the first nations before I buy that they really believe the bullshit they spew about “states rights” and “small states need to be protected from big states”.
I feel this so much in Australia. If a people on the internet remembers that Australia exists it is always like one of the same 3 jokes and nothing else ever.
On the topic of cultural variation, Australian states are really far apart, but population wise very small (mostly in the low millions). I have a friend in a different state and we just keep running into odd slang that is specific to a single state.
What are the 3 jokes? I’ll guess:
- upside down
- prisoners
- dingo ate my baby
drop bears
No emu war?
SHRIMP ON THE BARBIE
Is the Michelin star KFC in Alice Springs one of them?
That’s crazy, how have I never heard about that. Maybe I’ll have to check that out.
One of the specific things i can remember is Meatbox and AB Pack are the same thing, just called that in WA and SA respectively.
I have no context for what meatbox and ab pack mean, but given multiple options, I don’t think there’s a chance in the world that I would have matched those two terms, lol.
I think most places call them halal snack packs, its really just a box of chips covered in kebab meat and sauce. I will stand by Meatbox, it is a box of meat. I swear by these things, there’s always a kebab shop nearby that sells them, all the kebab shops are independent yet similar, and it’s like $15-20 (AUD) for far too much good food.
There are three countries now, USA, Europe and China
Australia used to be the fourth, but when a bunch of people claimed we didn’t exist we realised it was easier to not correct them
China is the “other” that Americans don’t talk to.
hamburgr shall not be touched. (by a european, from europe). i will tell boris jonson about not to touch ur burgr.
will touch pretzels 🥨 instead-
also hiiiiii chloooeeeeee~ ~ ~ ~ <3 heyhi!!! hiiii!!! 👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋 hello!!! heyhi hi there chloeee!!! <3 <3 🥕 💖🌸 <3 hello hi chloe hiiiii!!! hey hi hello im here!! and u too!!! hello chloe!!! we r both here!! on the internet 🛜! hiiii chloe from the internet!!! <3 🛜🍼💖🌸🍓🍰🧛♀️👩🍼🌌 welcome chloe to this comment!! the comment welcomes u to reading it:
“hello chloe 🥕, i suggest u read me”
- the commenton the internet, everything is possible. third spaces “video games” (those r ki da like games - but totally digital and stuff… feels weird - but its real!.. and feels less exciting to play than real ones 🩱 - but still!). imagine the internet is a ppace where things happen - its like real life (which is not merica, not europa and not even real, but also real) but not real!.. which is not exciting. chloe, i want u to feel greeted. u make me wana buy a scarf 🧣 too. u make me wana purchase nice clothes for the winter. u makee wana hug u. wishes go out from europe (from me, the european) to u, dear chloe (mayb a european, mayb not - but certainly nothing else, cuz theres just merica and europa). i got no idea what those 50 sub countries r btw- sounds kinda sketchy. like - what do they do - control 50 countries with a single president? or control each sub-country with different leaders, who r gona have diffrnt onions 🧅? both options sound kinda real bad.,… but yea, all that merica stuff is kinda goin over my head anyway - cuz im a european who doesnt know what a sub country even looks like-
touches hamburger (person from Hamburg) instead
JFK: Ik bin ein Hamburger
hello maria :3
awwwwww hiiii chloeeee <3 <3<3<3<3<3 hellooooo chloeee ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ , ~~ ~ ~ <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 hiiiii!!! hiiiii chloe ~<3 im greeting u again from europa to chloeland <3
i believe that in chloeland, theres caféèééèés and tea drinking places and bakeries and comfy libraries and fren places ~<3
Take my upvote smorty. It don’t mean nothing but it don’t cost nothing either. You might be European but you sure know your Internet’s all the same. That’s a real wall of slag you left there for us (/¯ ಠ_ಠ)/¯
