I’ve pretty much hit rock bottom and come to the conclusion that I can’t stay on my current trajectory. It’s already cost me one, if not two, relationships, and I’m tired of dating on hard mode. I’m worried I might be too far gone, so it would be immensely helpful to hear from someone who’s been in the same place and managed to turn things around.
I can manage a week or two with the power of self loathing but once the urges come back I’m really, and I mean really good at coming up with excuses.
How much are you jerking it? How has it affected your relationships? Are you jerking it to the point you’re not having sex with your gf? Is it interfering with other activities or responsibilities? Were you happy in those relationships to begin with?
Sometimes 8 - 12 hours a day, multiple days in a row. I have no interest in sex at all and yes, that obviously affects my relationships as well as other duties.
Sorry to say, but I think you know already, but at this point it sounds like classic addiction behaviour. Similar to alcoholism, gambling, gaming addiction…
I suggest you look up resources on how to beat addiction in general. And don’t forget, anyone can fall into a trap like this, you are not weak for having a relapse, you are strong for trying again.