There was a time in my childhood, when I wanted fiction to be real, and really hated fiction that I didn’t like because it meant those bad things will be real. I thought religion was like a tale that adults also believed in.

I got somewhat more open to religion during my teen years, as far-right orgs tried to (ideologically) groom me, and of course it involved me getting bombarded with “if you’re atheist, you’ll be sad and suicidal” type bullshit.