• exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    16 hours ago

    Two things.

    First, dating and commitment is about matching and compatibility, not about some kind of objective ranking system of quality or merit. It’s about how a partner or potential partner rates on your own personal scale, not some sort of societal scale built by social consensus. So while it is ok for you to find a particular trait to be a negative, or even a deal breaker, your point is completely irrelevant to the advice being given, which is not to hide important traits of one’s identity.

    Second, your own preference here is stated in unnecessarily condescending terms, as if your preferences are right and the opposite preference is wrong or the sign of some kind of disorder. Whatever your definition of “toys and dolls” are, it probably isn’t a very tightly defined term, and I’d venture to guess that you are OK with some kinds of “toys” but not others. People collect stuff. People develop emotional attachment to physical things all the time. And for you to gatekeep and say which things are acceptable or unacceptable is kinda an asshole move.

    • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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      16 hours ago

      I’m taking a somewhat oppositional position to OP! I’m not gatekeeping anything, just expanding on the topic. And no, I personally have never collected anything nor do I particularly care for decoration, and I find being attached to material possessions to that extent says something not necessarily dangerous or immoral about you, but it does still. So, while being obsessed with toys is not at the core of any ideological or personality-dependent negative attribute (nor does it constitute one by itself), it does serve as a litmus test for whether the person is, you know, ‘regular’. Come on, you go to a guy’s house and he has nothing but Goku and Vegeta inflatable dolls and refuses to take off the Piccolo doorag in his 30s and you’re not gonna think he might be a tad infantile and focused on less than important things?

      • petrol_sniff_king@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        11 hours ago

        and you’re not gonna think he might be a tad infantile

        The question is: why should I?

        I don’t believe you’re more mature because you have fewer doorags, dude.

        I do believe someone having this much contempt for keeping art in their house is a little weird.