Alternate advice given by my farmer grandmother: form as many connections as you like regardless how deep they run, because your social connections are important. But know that everything probably has an expiry date, no matter how well you keep it, like dairy. Give your love freely, take the love given to you freely and without question, and understand that everything is temporary. Even dairy.
Maybe it was just commentary on dairy. Idk.
I understand that very much. “I’ll let you do x” is not the same thing as “let’s do xyzabcdefg together as equally invested beings”
I’m glad that you and they are in better places; the stones that pile up on your side make you the mountain you are. :)