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Cake day: 2024年1月29日

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  • Foreigner@lemmy.worldtobirding@lemmy.worldBirding life
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    12 天前

    Basically a bird you’ve been trying to see multiple times but it’s eluded you so far. Other useful terms:

    • Lifer: A specific species of bird you’ve seen for the first time ever
    • Jizz: The bird’s ‘vibe’, if you will. Sometimes you can’t see or hear a bird well enough but you can tell what it is by a combination of factors like the way it flies/moves, its behaviour, location, etc. That’s jizz.
    • Little Brown Jobs/Birds (LBJ/Bs): Lots of birds are small, brown and look very alike. It’s hell to tell some of them apart.
    • Windfucker: this isn’t an actual useful term, it’s the old english name for a kestrel. I just find it very funny.

    Edited to format


  • Foreigner@lemmy.worldtobirding@lemmy.worldBirding life
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    13 天前

    Thanks to the ebird map I was able to pinpoint the exact spot I needed and saw a whole family of bearded reedlings last week! It’s truly amazing. A few other things I recommend:

    • Merlin app (free) - Shazam for birdsong. Also has helpful photos for ID, and can narrow down birds to the ones most likely to be in your area

    • Sibley birds app (paid) - digitalised bird ID book for birds in the Americas. Saves you from having to lug a heavy book around

    • Collins bird guide app (paid) - similar to the above but Europe focused

    • Birdingplaces website (free) - helpful if you’re looking for recommended spots to find birds. Each entry usually indicates recommended routes.

    • Bird journal mobile/desktop app (free) - you have to sideload this one on mobile, and it hasn’t been updated in years. However, I find it’s the easiest to use if you want to make a record of the species you’ve seen.

    Edit: I would be remiss if I didn’t also share guidelines for ethical birding:

    https://birdlife.org.au/how-to/ethical-birdwatching-guidelines/

    Tl/dr: Don’t get too close (especially around nests), don’t make too much noise, don’t mess with their habitat, don’t feed wild birds or use playback to attract them.


  • Foreigner@lemmy.worldtobirding@lemmy.worldBirding life
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    13 天前

    Do iiiitttt!! You don’t need expensive equipment, a decent pair of 8×42 binoculars is enough to get started (I like Bushnell’s). It’s a great way to spend time in nature and it can make such a difference for your mental health. That is, until you run into your first nemesis bird. Then there’s only rage…




  • Sorry for the delay, I’ve only just got the chance to sit down and reply. To your point about incels, how would you feel if someone making a meme saying “all women are gold-diggers”. How do you react to incels saying things like women are trashy and only want trashy men and not good guys, or women are weak porcelain dolls and wouldn’t survive without men. Would your reaction not be that not all women are like that? That most women aren’t like that? This is the same shit, the genders are just reversed. Is it any less true if the rebuttal comes from a woman arguing in good faith vs an extremist TERF? I’m not defending incels, but if they sound the same as someone making a good faith rebuttal, maybe it makes young impressionable men and boys think they might have a point. And if they’re right about that, what else might they be right about? This is exactly how people get sucked into cults and far right groups.

    I feel your example with guns (while still a generalisation) is different from this kind of meme because it’s about appealing to empathy. This meme is not doing that, it’s using shame to supposedly get men to reflect and change. I argue it’s not very effective, and there are way better ways to do this. You share one example - appeal to empathy. I’ve seen memes praising men for positive actions they take (e.g. green flag memes).

    This kind of discourse is also harmful to transmac individuals. I’ve unfortunately seen trans men being ostracized from the very communities they relied on for support as soon as they ‘pass’. Once they look just like other men, they are seen as a threat and are unwelcome. If this kind of divisive language and approach only impact those doing harm to women, then fine. But it’s not and it’s doing a bunch of collateral damage in the process.

    It’s shouldn’t be hard to point out positive role models without resorting to belittling people. Most men have strengths (literally) most women don’t - let’s talk about how they can use those strengths to be a positive force in society. I see way more jokes and memes saying men are trash rather than talk about how they are can be important and positive part of the movement towards equality. Just like the LGBTQIA+ movement would never have made it as far as it did without the help of our allies (and trust me I’m not giving them most of the credit), we’re never going to get equality and freedom across genders if we don’t work on bringing men as our allies too.




  • You may think no one is saying “all men”, but I promise you I’ve seen this very discourse online and irl. My question to you is, what do you hope to achieve with these memes? To voice your anger, or change people’s minds? I’m not defending those who perpetuate the patriarchy, but let’s not shoot ourselves in the foot by alienating men who would otherwise be on our side if they didn’t feel like they had to face an angry mob. Please, let’s not use the same weapons used against us for millennia - it’s not working and frankly I am concerned it is starting to actually backfire (see: young men throwing themselves into the arms of the far right). We are literally playing into the hands of those who want to divide us.


  • Lesbian here, so maybe not the target audience for this. However this kind of meme and discourse makes me somewhat uncomfortable. Like, really? Pedro Pascal is -the only nice guy- in the world, every other guy is trash? Too often I hear women speak about men as if they’re inherently bad people, rather than victims of the patriarchy just like them. It reeks of “that’s just the way men are” and “boys will be boys”, except now it’s being used to shame and admonish. Shame isn’t going to change mindsets, it’s only going to make people defensive. It’s not as if men are genetically assholes, but these kinds of memes sure make it sound like they are.

    It bothers me because I have a son who will grow up to become a man (at least that’s how it’s looking right now). I worry about what he internalises when he hears that people expect he’ll grow up to be a sexist asshole, just because he was born a boy. I have to defend against that just like I defend my daughter when sexism is directed at her, because frankly that’s exactly what it is. If I were told from a young age that the default expectation is I’ll grow up to be trash just because I have a penis, why bother to do better? I’d probably also listen to the Tates and Petersons who make me feel good about myself instead.

    I understand why women are angry and frustrated, they have every right to be. I’ve also been on the receiving end of sexist and frankly traumatic shit because I was born a girl. I just don’t feel like it’ll get any better by creating more division, more “us vs them”.









  • Congrats on coming out and being your true self, that was a very brave thing to do.

    Your mother, like many parents, had hopes and dreams about who you would become as a person. She’s now being faced with the prospect that those hopes and dreams are dead, that the person she thought you would become is gone. She’s going to need to grieve and from what you’ve written here it seems that process has started. Shock, denial, bargaining, some level of acceptance. I expect anger and depression might show up at some point. It doesn’t necessarily happen in sequence and can cycle too. She’s going to need some time to process, but what’s positive is she’s not outright rejecting who you are, there’s room for her to grow.

    My parents weren’t hostile when I came out as gay, but I heard similar things - it’s just a phase. Are you sure? Was it something we did? Where did we go wrong? What will your life become? Over time they came to accept it and told my extended family (including my very religious Pentecostal grandmother). Everyone is now very welcoming of my wife and my parents are delighted to be grandparents to our kids. I know it’s not the same, but there is hope for things to get better, just keep being authentically you.