I’m in a field where remote work should be possible, but I’m not lucky enough to have landed such a job. I have to go to the office every single damn day.
It’s an 8 hour job, but I have mandatory one hour lunch, so it’s really 9 fucking hours. Comute is about an hour each way, so that makes 11h total. Oh, but wait, I take transport and have to wait some time for a bus one way or the other, so it’s more like 11h30.
To wakeup and get ready for work I need 30 min minimum, but really 1h is better. So it’s up to 12h, or 12:30. Let’s round it to 12:15.
That’s half my damn day. If I want to sleep for 8 hours, that leaves me 3h45min at most each day for myself. And I don’t even get paid enough to move out. Which I guess is a positive in this case, because that way I don’t waste my <4 daily hours taking care of tasks which my parents can help with (cooking, groceries, etc.)
Ironically, if I did get paid enough to move out I might be even more depressed.
Welcome to the meat grinder my friend.
You sound part of the younger generation starting to enter the work force. Stay at home as long as possible (family situation permitting) and save your pennies.
I think these days with the current climate you have it really tough - everything is fucked in the work world and its all about more production more money at the cost of your soul. Good employers are far and few between.
You have 2 options:
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Stay on your current trajectory and feed yourself in to the grinder, you might eventially find stability.
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Alternative life paths to the traditional ones.
I know a few people that barely work and travel around all the time. They are some of the happiest people I know. They usually have a skill that can be traded for goods or money like painting, woodwork, think trade based skills, handyman stuff.
You also have the third option of asking your parents for a small loan of 1 million dollars and starting your own business.
Unfortunately I’m not that young. I’m at a point where I would like to have my own place, find someone, get married, maybe have kids in a few years. But I don’t have the money, and much less the work/life balance necessary. There’s been a couple of times where a girl asked if I have my own place, and it always hurts to answer.
I don’t know about your age or situation, but if you’re old enough that you’re taking care of your parents in a reasonable capacity, then you’re no longer living with your parents, your parents are living with you.
Mid to late 20’s?
I think its quite shallow to judge someone based on their living situation - sounds like dodged bullets to me.
If its any consolation, my wife and I lived in a single room in her mothers house for several years before getting our own place. We were both living with our parents at the time we met, it sounds like you just havent found the right person for you. Don’t rush to the next stage of life. Give it time, we all come from different walks of life and follow different paths.
I was on track to buy a van and start driving around Australia like the other people I mentioned until I met my now wife and everything changed.
Have a loose plan for what you want in life and keep an open mind. Things change all the time and what you think you might want one day will do a 180 the next. Adapt your life plan to suit and continue forwards!
After all, we as humans are just fancy blocks of carbon and water that talk and do dumb shit. Nothing really matters - we will be dirt and worms one day and the earth will keep spinning.
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11 hours for me. 1 hour prep, 1 hour commute there, 8 hours to work assuming I eat and work at the same time, 1 hour commute home.
It’s maddening. I don’t get it.
I’m hybrid, so 2 days a week I work flat 8 hours and it is bliss, then 3 days a week I “work” 11 hours but only get paid for 8 - at least, that’s how I view it.
longer if you use public transport, or you have to pay for rideshares.
You could try to be a billionaire – they have an overall happier life.
they seem miserable to me, you have to be a psycopath to be that rich. and they have obsession with longevity, even so much that its thier identity.
Oh those miserable long-living billionaires… Yeah, who wants that instead of a short shitty life in poverty?
This is one of the main reasons I went self-employed. Work takes up such a huge chunk of the time I’ll spend on this planet that it really matters what I do with it.
I didn’t hate my previous job, but I just couldn’t bear the thought of doing that until retirement.
I took quite the pay cut, but I also work less, and nobody tells me what to do.
Don’t move out unless you want to piss away the rest of any crumb of free time you have.
Shave your head and get back 45 mins
have to wait some time for a bus one way or the other
[waiting about 30 minutes]
…and…
Comute is about an hour each way,
[where you are not having to pay attention to driving]
but I have mandatory one hour lunch,
This is 3.5 approximately hours a day that have no responsibilities to your job that you can put your attention on other subjects. lets even allow a subtraction of 30 minutes for having to change buses/trains or set up of lunch and clean up. This leaves about 3 hours a day. This is your resource for personal/professional improvement and change.
This is a huge untapped value that you can use to change your situation! Have you thought how you could use this time to move yourself forward?
I would recommend spending that time on looking for a better job.
Thats absolutely a great thing to do. Depending on OP’s skills/employability at this second it may not yield a much better job than they have currently. However, if there is a better job available with no other change needed, this would be a great use of the time to search for it.
I was in a similar situation to the OP where I didn’t like my job but had these pockets of time that I could use for change while still keeping my job and being paid. I did not have a college degree and used this time to get one while still working. It took many years (because I couldn’t go full time), but I was successful in getting that degree and used it to get a significantly better job. When I was at the beginning I saw the time was going to pass whether I put the effort in to improve or not, so I chose to use the time to get something of value instead.
