This zinger:
you can educate your self without bothering others
Is in the same lieu of:
It’s not my job to be nice
I’ve read the 🧵, OP posted this to be antisocial, and cement their ASPD against the quo.
If you’re a neurologist enthusiast like me, you already know to educate folks you’ll probably never meet again. Even a simple “my disabilities are XYZ, here is my pamphlet about how I want to be interacted with.” is good enough. Access to biased education is a privilege. Access to knowledge of your unique disabilities and how you deal with them, priceless.
It’s literally upto you how you want to engage in your priceless interaction with someone curious. I choose the statistic of being their only one educator they’ll ever have access to learn from, and decide on their own if they want to become comrades or strangers.
Life is really a story we choose to tell or disengage. Since I am a lover of stories, I share mines all the time🥰.
If it’s not blatant, I am addressing everyone else but OP. OP needs a psychiatric help.
It’s true though, I don’t mind. My chair even does tricks!
Never interact with anyone in case they don’t want to interact with you. If you have to tell someone you don’t want to talk you’ve already been irrevocably traumatised.
The alternative is not that people “educate themselves” in some other way it’s that everyone is more ignorant.
Exactly. We still have to have a society, we just need to be considerate about it
Nah, this ain’t it. My disability is mine. You can’t educate yourself about it without asking me. You can educate yourself about similar disabilities affecting similar people, but not about mine specifically. So ask. Could you upset me? Sure. Could you trigger me? Absolutely. But you won’t know unless you ask, and I would never fault someone who just earnestly wanted to know more about another person, even if they accidentally caused harm in doing so.
Interacting with people comes with the inherent risk of causing harm, but it is necessary in order for us to understand each other and gain respect for one another. If you’re uncomfortable about someone earnestly approaching you to ask about something, that’s fine, just tell them. But don’t try to promote the idea that it’s bad to even earnestly approach someone in the first place.
I’ve been noticing a lot of comics getting posted to Lemmy lately having pretty bad opinions. Wonder what that’s about. The comments are full of disagreement so it’s not just the “Lemmy culture”.
Hard disagree. If you won’t take the time out of your day to explain to a curious passerby something about your identity that puts you in a minority, you are making an active choice to passively perpetuate prejudice.
It’s not even about the information. As a member of a group, whenever you encounter someone not from your group you unwittingly become an ambassador for your group to that person. Whether you like it or not, that person’s opinion of your group is directly influenced by how you respond.
If you politely educate, people will come away with a more positive opinion of your group than if you dismiss or demean them. And if their curiosity is taking up too much of your time and energy, you have the advantageous ability to refer them to resources that you know and trust.
The general population, in my experience, puts more stock in anecdotal evidence than research. Add onto that all the pop culture and pseudoscience articles and the advent of AI like ChatGPT, you’re putting blind faith and trust in someone else’s ability to learn about something that is a part of your daily life.
Now, some people who struggle with social interactions should be given the patience and grace they need. But denying your role as an ambassador of your group because you see it as ‘not your responsibility’ negatively impacts your community. It’s an incredibly selfish, shortsighted act that causes harm through follow-on interactions.
I’m with this comic on the last bit. If the person says “no it’s OK, I can manage”, then don’t impose.
The first two bits are literally chastising curiosity. Are you against people being educated? Because education starts with the willingness to learn, and learning starts by asking questions.
Unless OOP is a blind wheel-chair riding muslim woman, OOP is trying to talk for other people.
Likely, OOP is neither blind, a wheel-chair rider, a muslim or a woman, and probably has never been in a situation like the one described in the cartoon, otherwise OOP would have actually used themself in a real-world situation.
My child has a disability, and we always talk to anyone who has questions, because answering questions is the only way to help people understand, and understanding is the only way to counter discrimination and to help people accomodate the needs of people who don’t fall inside the “norm”.
So OP, please stop spreading crap.
I feel like the comic is giving the wrong take away in each of the 3 situations.
1 isnt a problem because of questions, it’s a problem because the mother is speaking for them, by claiming ‘they wont mind.’
The only problem i see with 2 is the ‘have to’ verbiage, implying its an external imposition, not a choice.
The problem witb 3 is forcing someone to accept help.
In all 3, its not a problem of trying to help, or learn, its speaking for or acting for them, against their wishes.
Taking away others agency is almost always a problem.
https://everydayfeminism.com/2015/06/problem-with-educate-me/
Etc etc I’m on my phone, but you can find more examples of all sorts of people tired of having to educate others about themselves.
Your situation is yours, that’s fine your child is happy to discuss it now. What happens if that changes after 40 years of having had to do it?
Be mindful that others differ from your experience.
Ironically, this post is hella bothersome
People educating themselves is how they fall into conspiracy theories and alt right ideologies. No thanks.
So going on YouTube and finding a video of a minority explaining something about them leads to becoming a Nazi.
But harassing people for information on the street is fine?
Okay, sure mate.
You know damn well that’s not what they’re going to do.
Hey, I’m a minority and you can ask me whatever you want. 95% of those interactions have been positive for me.
Most people I’ve met with visible disabilities would prefer to have a discussion about it, since most people just stare awkwardly. YMMV
Nah fuck this shit, if you have a question for me then ask it. You will never learn anything if you don’t seek knowledge.
The last panel is fucked though, don’t go putting your hands on people.
2946292946% THIS!
The whole “I’m not your Google” shtick has done more to harm marginalized communities and minorities than it’s helped. People who are “ally-curious” often are afraid to expand their knowledge by asking first hand experiences. So they go and Google shit. And then they come to their own conclusions and are subsequently shit on by people in the very community they support because they’re accused of assuming one’s experience.
I’m trans in a small town of about 7k. I can say with certainty that my openness to have respectful conversations about it when asked has improved things overall. If I had taken the stance presented here, the first, and likely ONLY first hand conversation with a trans person these people would ever have would have been a negative one and therefor painted us ALL negatively.
Just get back to having open, honest fucking conversations people.
Fuck. Just… FUCK. This just pisses me off.
Ok. Deeeeeep breaths.
Completely agree, this just promotes silos between cultures/people and more misunderstandings.
If someone tells you they don’t want to be bothered then of course leave them alone, but you can’t know that without approaching them first.
Don’t agree with the message in this comic at all.
I have learned so much by just asking, Most people are more than happy to talk about themselves as long as you are respectful.
Remember you’re only speaking for yourself there, so be careful that you don’t encourage it done to others who may not be happy to and just want to stop being othered.
At which part of the comic are you speaking for yourself?
The part where you are a brown male wheelchair rider, the part where you are a muslim woman or the part where you are a white blind man?
If you want to speak for yourself, please speak for yourself and not for everyone else.
I’m not a visible minority, but this is what I have come to learn after listening to an amazing Aboriginal woman’s talk at a conference years ago.
If you are genuinely curious, there are so many resources out there to learn about others experiences and appropriate venues to ask them questions.
You don’t know what way people on the street are going to receive your request/burden for them to exert their time and effort to educate you on, so just don’t. You don’t know how upsetting it may be to constantly be sought out and othered.
So if you don’t know, don’t do it. Find an appropriate way to learn.
Asking people their personal experience is the most appropriate way to learn about things outside your own experience.
Yeah, some people don’t want to share. Those people can say that. When everyone uses their words instead of making assumptions about what people do and don’t want, the world is a better place.
It’s interesting that you say specifically, “sought out and othered”, because I think that without the experience of being not just a minority but discriminated against, this just wouldn’t even come up. I’ve had so many conversations with people from different cultures where we told each other about various traditions, foods and all sorts. It’s the most natural conversation in the world when in mixed company. But there is no tinge of prejudice in the experiences I am thinking of.
You don’t know how a person on the street or anywhere else will respond to ANY interaction. By this logic we just shouldn’t talk to one another.
We ALL get it. You’re burned out. Take a seat champ. You’re also alone in your thinking here and trying to force others to commit to saying fuck off to any who want to genuinely learn and maybe help our communities.
Smfh
At what point do we draw the line? If I ask you a question and you don’t want to talk about it you have every right to refuse to answer, but I think it’s okay to ask.
Do you randomly bother strangers with deep, possibly upsetting:triggering questions?
That’s the line. Treat them like anyone else you see on the street.
I mean, if someone asks a polite question, the other person can just as politely say “I’d rather not talk about that”, and then everyone goes along with their day
I mean, someone can just go on YT and find the answer from someone happily discussing it. That way if the person was going to be upset by being asked they wouldn’t, and you found your information. And then everyone goes along with their day.
It’s really the best of both worlds, I don’t see how there is such strong pushback to such basic respect.
go on YT
WWWWW, the same YouTube destroying public knowledge with slop. The same YouTube enabling nazis. The same Youtube caught predating on children.
Just tell people to kill themselves, far easier and precise.
I think the biggest issue is that you’ve assumed everyone is the same and wants to be treated the same.
The world isn’t black and white. People are telling you their personal preferences and you’re telling them that they’re wrong.
You’re fighting other people’s battles for them even when they’re telling you that they’d prefer you not to - you’re literally acting like the guy in the last panel.
If there’s anything that we’ve learned over the last horrible year it’s that getting all of your information off social media is a recipe for disaster.
I would find it less respectful for someone to assume things about me based on what they see on social media. If their question is polite and born out of genuine curiosity, and they don’t react poorly to hearing “I don’t want to talk about that right now”, I would much rather someone ask me a question directly.
I honestly find it a little baffling to think that we should try to avoid talking to people that are different than us and learning about their experiences, in the name of “respect”.
By that logic this comic is wrong.
This comic reminds me of my 14 year old niece expressing annoyance because an elderly person asked her if she knew how to get to the highway.
Retelling the story she said “Why are they talking to me? Just Google it”
And that was a once off!
Imagine that everyday of your life for 50 years having to be reminded that you’re different from the “normal” people. That you can’t just sit on the train and read your phone without being bothered.
Classic liberal bad take. Target the segment of the population that might have an open mind rather than the segment of the population that needs their mind opened.
I’m colour blind and enjoy answering questions about it. I get the idea here, but completely disagree with it personally.
Last panel seems unrelated to the rest of the comic.
