Via: Poorly Drawn Lines
Transcript
Panel 1: A man stands next to a microwave. Narrator: “Congratulations, your microwave has gained sentience.” Microwave: “Hello!”. Panel 2: Narrator: “There is no clear benefit to this, and the situation does raise ethical questions.” Panel 3: Man: “Can I return it?” Panel 4: Narrator: “It, huh? That’s kind of a person, now.” The man grimaces. Panel 5: Narrator: “But mainly, you’re outside the 30-day return window.” Man: “Shit.” Microwave: “I have thoughts and emotions.”


Maybe your microwave is already sentient, it just can’t speak.
That’s why it stays unplugged except when in use.
Taking no chances.
I have no mouth and I must beam
My brain went to “beep”, but yours is better
Maybe it could beep in Morse Code.