I was living in Toronto and moved back to Newfoundland. I moved into a place with a friend. That friend started to go through some stuff and then started to take advantage of me in a lot of ways. Ways that I’m only still just realizing. Like I was doing laundry earlier and realized she never bought laundry detergent the entire time she was here, just used mine. For the better part of a year. Anyway she stopped paying bills for months and then stopped paying rent for. Last second was like “Evict me and find someone else!” but I was being a moron and was like “Nah you’re my friend! Let’s get through this!” and then the next day realized that she was waiting for me to do all the work for her. Lost my best friend.
Started looking for another roommate but I’ve found it nearly impossible. Didn’t help I started looking in September when everyone had already found a place for university. At the end of September I had to make a post asking for help and donations to my ko-fi so I could afford rent. October went almost the entire month and I couldn’t find someone as well. At the end of the month I messaged my sister, in a deep pit of emotional despair, asking if she could take the only good thing in my life and take care of her if I couldn’t find a roommate. I love my cat. She needs to be happy and safe. Even if that means she’s not with me… She said yes to taking care of the cat but also that she’d ask friends. And so she did. One of these friends reached out and said “My cousin is looking for a place, here’s his number!”
So I texted this dude for a bit and all seemed okay but I was getting slightly off vibes from pics. He had pinpoint pupils in all of them and I could explain it away to an extent because he said he was on disability from an injury so maybe prescription meds did that. But he kept changing his mind about when he was moving in as well as the situations of how it was changing just felt odd. The day he was supposed to move in, October 31st, that friend messaged my sister again saying urgently to not let him move into the house. Evidently, he was stealing from the family to fuel a drug habit and they discovered it last minute when he was stealing their shit to pay for the move into my place. And I was a naive trusting idiot again and didn’t bother taking a deposit so I was screwed.
A friend of mine posted here to lemmy saying ‘Stamets needs help!’ and just like when I asked for help the month before, a ton of people turned up to help me when I frankly don’t deserve it. Again, I was able to make rent and even pay bills as people went above and beyond. But the sp3ctr4l specter of finding a roommate was still lingering and unfortunately I was terrified for my cat.
But.
A woman reached out the other day and asked to schedule a viewing. I asked if today would work because I pulled something in my back and I’m all kinds of screwy. She said sure. She showed up and took a look at the place today. Una immediately fell in love with her. She liked the place and we seemed to mesh pretty well. She’s got her own cat as well so my kitty gets to have a friend! And… better yet… I get to stay with my kitty.
No no… it’s literally the reason I’ve been crying. I spent half of my 20s homeless. Do I want to be homeless again? Fuckin’ no. But I could deal with it. But I am a completely different person since meeting Una. She’s changed my life in so many ways and all of them have been for the better. I’ve talked to some friends who I haven’t been able to speak with in ages and all of them have said that I’m not the same guy that they knew. Something I take as a compliment. But the idea of losing her and going back to being that guy is terrifying
I was gonna threaten to gay marry you to escape the US and be your roommate for as long as Social Security Disability still exists, lol.
Also, hopefully you mean you fell in love with this woman as a roommate, and not uh, more broadly.
You just got out of a busted, lopsided relationship of being exploited because you’re too trusting.
I’ve been there too, please do not actually fall in love with this person, you need time to renormalize and fully understand all the ways roommate exploited you, and why they worked.
But, anyway, great news that you’ve found a roommate, hopefully you can begin to relax your chest and breathe a bit more calmly now =D
Oh god no, she just seems like a good roommate. We’re friendly and can get along but not sure we’d be fully friends. I don’t know, I could be wrong. But my gay ass has no intention of falling in love with a woman, don’t worry lmao
<3
Also surprised you didn’t mention the callout I gave your name specifically in that comment you replied to.
Nah I just thought you’d laugh at the way I said sp3ctr4l spectre was all.
Roommates kitty is a sort of yellowishbrownish person cat. My cat? Black cat with a tiny tiny tuft of white on her chest and the tip of her tail looks like it was dipped in white paint. Here’s some videos of her back in the summer when I took her out in the backyard.
Oh, I mean, I did chuckle, aloud, in the meat realm, but I thought it would have been kinda … self-aggrandizing to make a written comment directly about it.
Perhaps my autism is turned up to 11 today, I dunno lol.
Adorable kitty, really, wish I could snuggle her.
Unfortunately, that extremely fashionable white tuft may be the source of my uh, miscalibration, so to speak.
And also … I find that people often get a bit too weird about cats and plants.
Yes, there are plants that can fuck with cats… but common grass isn’t really one of them.
What is much more likely to be harmful to your cat is a whole lot of fairly common house plants or garden plants, maybe a few which grow naturally nearby where you live, if you have an actual real yard?
Before my cat passed away, I actually just had him a specifically cat safe kind of indoor potted grass for him, think it was oat grass?.. he liked to bat at it and munch on it from time to time, sometimes just kinda rub himself on it.
Hopefully, he’s in some other realm now, with all the oat grass and turkey and tuna he could ever want, some other flies to chase and birds to be confused by, some other nose to boop from time to time.
I’ve actually been meaning to get my kitty some cat grass to munch on but I either keep forgetting or just can’t afford it at the time.
It sounds like your lil guy was definitely spoiled rotten too. I’m sure he still is wherever the little guy is. Hopefully playing with my old Doggo and frolicking completely free
Eh. There are limits to being trusting. I should have used some more caution in certain cases. Should have asked more. Should have asserted myself more. I’m not blameless in all of it.
Oh we haven’t really talked since anyway. I did text her after asking my sister to take Una… said how much I hated her because I was going to lose the only good thing in my life due to her. But when she texted back I realized it was a massive mistake and I blocked her.
Thank you <3 And me too… Una has been a bit hissy to the new kitty but only in the sense of “Stay away from me”. So hoping they’ll warm up after a while
This makes me so happy to read. (Edit: the result, not the crap leading up to it.) Your posts bring me much joy in what is otherwise a quite depressing world right now, so hearing that you have some good going on in your life is excellent. I hope you thrive 💕
So do I… and thank you so much. The world does need to suck a little less. I’m glad that I can help make things just a little less shitty. Sorry I’ve been lax on the posting past few days. Between roommate hunting and back pain it’s been an event.
I was living in Toronto and moved back to Newfoundland. I moved into a place with a friend. That friend started to go through some stuff and then started to take advantage of me in a lot of ways. Ways that I’m only still just realizing. Like I was doing laundry earlier and realized she never bought laundry detergent the entire time she was here, just used mine. For the better part of a year. Anyway she stopped paying bills for months and then stopped paying rent for. Last second was like “Evict me and find someone else!” but I was being a moron and was like “Nah you’re my friend! Let’s get through this!” and then the next day realized that she was waiting for me to do all the work for her. Lost my best friend.
Started looking for another roommate but I’ve found it nearly impossible. Didn’t help I started looking in September when everyone had already found a place for university. At the end of September I had to make a post asking for help and donations to my ko-fi so I could afford rent. October went almost the entire month and I couldn’t find someone as well. At the end of the month I messaged my sister, in a deep pit of emotional despair, asking if she could take the only good thing in my life and take care of her if I couldn’t find a roommate. I love my cat. She needs to be happy and safe. Even if that means she’s not with me… She said yes to taking care of the cat but also that she’d ask friends. And so she did. One of these friends reached out and said “My cousin is looking for a place, here’s his number!”
So I texted this dude for a bit and all seemed okay but I was getting slightly off vibes from pics. He had pinpoint pupils in all of them and I could explain it away to an extent because he said he was on disability from an injury so maybe prescription meds did that. But he kept changing his mind about when he was moving in as well as the situations of how it was changing just felt odd. The day he was supposed to move in, October 31st, that friend messaged my sister again saying urgently to not let him move into the house. Evidently, he was stealing from the family to fuel a drug habit and they discovered it last minute when he was stealing their shit to pay for the move into my place. And I was a naive trusting idiot again and didn’t bother taking a deposit so I was screwed.
A friend of mine posted here to lemmy saying ‘Stamets needs help!’ and just like when I asked for help the month before, a ton of people turned up to help me when I frankly don’t deserve it. Again, I was able to make rent and even pay bills as people went above and beyond. But the sp3ctr4l specter of finding a roommate was still lingering and unfortunately I was terrified for my cat.
But.
A woman reached out the other day and asked to schedule a viewing. I asked if today would work because I pulled something in my back and I’m all kinds of screwy. She said sure. She showed up and took a look at the place today. Una immediately fell in love with her. She liked the place and we seemed to mesh pretty well. She’s got her own cat as well so my kitty gets to have a friend! And… better yet… I get to stay with my kitty.
Dude you received the help because you deserve it.
Not to minimize all of the shit you’ve been going thorough… you get to keep your kitty!!!
Life without mine would be sad.
Very, very sad.
No no… it’s literally the reason I’ve been crying. I spent half of my 20s homeless. Do I want to be homeless again? Fuckin’ no. But I could deal with it. But I am a completely different person since meeting Una. She’s changed my life in so many ways and all of them have been for the better. I’ve talked to some friends who I haven’t been able to speak with in ages and all of them have said that I’m not the same guy that they knew. Something I take as a compliment. But the idea of losing her and going back to being that guy is terrifying
That’s how I feel about buttons. My silly little old girl laying on me as I type. The very best lapdog of a cat I’ve ever had.
Holy shit, I am so glad you found a roommate!
I was gonna threaten to gay marry you to escape the US and be your roommate for as long as Social Security Disability still exists, lol.
Also, hopefully you mean you fell in love with this woman as a roommate, and not uh, more broadly.
You just got out of a busted, lopsided relationship of being exploited because you’re too trusting.
I’ve been there too, please do not actually fall in love with this person, you need time to renormalize and fully understand all the ways roommate exploited you, and why they worked.
But, anyway, great news that you’ve found a roommate, hopefully you can begin to relax your chest and breathe a bit more calmly now =D
Oh god no, she just seems like a good roommate. We’re friendly and can get along but not sure we’d be fully friends. I don’t know, I could be wrong. But my gay ass has no intention of falling in love with a woman, don’t worry lmao
<3
Also surprised you didn’t mention the callout I gave your name specifically in that comment you replied to.
I mean, I replied to the comment you specifically mentioned me in… did I not?
Did I reply to a different comment?
???
Like, you didn’t summon me explicitly with a proper mention, but again, like an ever present, but never obvious specter … here I am.
Hrm.
Is either your or this roommate’s kitty a void kitty?
If so, I may be able to retune my calibration to uh, your realm.
God, do I hate this part.
Nah I just thought you’d laugh at the way I said sp3ctr4l spectre was all.
Roommates kitty is a sort of yellowishbrownish person cat. My cat? Black cat with a tiny tiny tuft of white on her chest and the tip of her tail looks like it was dipped in white paint. Here’s some videos of her back in the summer when I took her out in the backyard.
Video 1
Video 2
Video 3
Don’t worry on the flora, none of it is toxic although it may look it. There was a panic about it at the time.
Oh, I mean, I did chuckle, aloud, in the meat realm, but I thought it would have been kinda … self-aggrandizing to make a written comment directly about it.
Perhaps my autism is turned up to 11 today, I dunno lol.
Adorable kitty, really, wish I could snuggle her.
Unfortunately, that extremely fashionable white tuft may be the source of my uh, miscalibration, so to speak.
And also … I find that people often get a bit too weird about cats and plants.
Yes, there are plants that can fuck with cats… but common grass isn’t really one of them.
What is much more likely to be harmful to your cat is a whole lot of fairly common house plants or garden plants, maybe a few which grow naturally nearby where you live, if you have an actual real yard?
https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/home-lifestyle/pets/g61795729/plants-toxic-to-cats/
Before my cat passed away, I actually just had him a specifically cat safe kind of indoor potted grass for him, think it was oat grass?.. he liked to bat at it and munch on it from time to time, sometimes just kinda rub himself on it.
Hopefully, he’s in some other realm now, with all the oat grass and turkey and tuna he could ever want, some other flies to chase and birds to be confused by, some other nose to boop from time to time.
I’ve actually been meaning to get my kitty some cat grass to munch on but I either keep forgetting or just can’t afford it at the time.
It sounds like your lil guy was definitely spoiled rotten too. I’m sure he still is wherever the little guy is. Hopefully playing with my old Doggo and frolicking completely free
Being naive and trusting isn’t a character flaw. The problem is that other people take advantage.
Calling yourself a naive and trusting idiot is victim blaming against yourself.
Eh. There are limits to being trusting. I should have used some more caution in certain cases. Should have asked more. Should have asserted myself more. I’m not blameless in all of it.
We learn from our mistakes, don’t blame yourself for that, you learned and grown. I don’t know you but I’m happy for you like everyone here :)
And I thank you for it <3 I really am fucking happy for once in a while…
Call yourself an idiot and then call it a learning opportunity. You can be a victim and an idiot at the same time! :)
That girl hasn’t been your best friend for a good while. Not since the moment she started taking advantage of you.
Oh we haven’t really talked since anyway. I did text her after asking my sister to take Una… said how much I hated her because I was going to lose the only good thing in my life due to her. But when she texted back I realized it was a massive mistake and I blocked her.
Awww I’m so happy for you (and your kitty!)
Thank you <3 And me too… Una has been a bit hissy to the new kitty but only in the sense of “Stay away from me”. So hoping they’ll warm up after a while
This makes me so happy to read. (Edit: the result, not the crap leading up to it.) Your posts bring me much joy in what is otherwise a quite depressing world right now, so hearing that you have some good going on in your life is excellent. I hope you thrive 💕
So do I… and thank you so much. The world does need to suck a little less. I’m glad that I can help make things just a little less shitty. Sorry I’ve been lax on the posting past few days. Between roommate hunting and back pain it’s been an event.
Grats man, glad to hear everything worked out! Hell of a ride.
Very much so and not one that I particularly enjoyed…