I guess I just don’t understand why being untruthful is considered more rude than being honest. I find being untruthful much more rude. Being untruthful and expecting me to guess that that’s what’s happening is what’s making the exchange complicated, it could be quite simple if they told the truth.
I suppose it’s a way of saying something along the lines of “I’m not feeling like it but I appreciate you enough to try to not be hurtful.” This form of implicit communication works very well in close-knit communities, but once you start mixing people with different backgrounds, it becomes much more efficient to be direct and literal, even if communication loses a bit of its charm.
I guess I just don’t understand why being untruthful is considered more rude than being honest. I find being untruthful much more rude. Being untruthful and expecting me to guess that that’s what’s happening is what’s making the exchange complicated, it could be quite simple if they told the truth.
Agreed. If you’re interested in better understanding the face-saving mores of global “honor cultures,” it’s a fairly interesting and relatively deep topic of study: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Face_(sociological_concept)
I suppose it’s a way of saying something along the lines of “I’m not feeling like it but I appreciate you enough to try to not be hurtful.” This form of implicit communication works very well in close-knit communities, but once you start mixing people with different backgrounds, it becomes much more efficient to be direct and literal, even if communication loses a bit of its charm.