This question is mainly targeted to women, but anybody is free to answer.
I was browsing somewhere, either here or Reddit, and came across a post that was mocking the types that demand too much from a woman’s physical appearance. I was reading through the comments, and while I can’t remember the exact phrasing from the one that caught my eye, it more or less read something like this:
“‘she must be skinny, have an hourglass figure, like anime, know how to cook and take care of the home, want kids, and be good in bed’ meanwhile he’s just a guy”
Likely clearly I can tell that this isn’t targeting me specifically since I can tell these are gross and entitled demands, but the phrase “just a guy” really has me wondering what that exactly means. It’s so vague, and as someone who’s trying to sort out what stands out to people in the dating scene, I do worry about being “just a guy”.
What does being “just a guy” encompass, and what is it that differentiates a guy from that? I’m personally trying to work on myself a bit more, but I still fear that possibility of never standing out to someone.
That phrase is simply comparing the requirements for the two sides:
The girl:
The guy:
What they are saying is that if you want a girl with that many requirements, you need to consider that you should also be able to match an extensive list of requirements similar to that (whichever they may be). It’s not any specific requirement, but by saying “just a guy” they probably mean the guy doesn’t pass any requirement they can think a girl may add to their own list.
There’s no specific thing you need to work on, but you should work on something. You may put work on your body to become attractive, you may be smart and funny, a very reliable or very charismatic person (not just for attraction but for dealing with people in general). You may be a good person to talk with by being genuinely interested in what others have to say. There’s a million possibilities.
As an exercise, imagine spending a day with someone. Try to think of everything you would do together. After thinking of the whole day, now imagine that same day all again, with everything happening exactly the same, but with you in the position of the other person. Would you have enjoyed being the other person in that imaginary day?