Kennedy is generally opposed to vaccines, but he is particularly hostile to mRNA-based vaccines

I reckon the mistake was calling them mRNA vaccines. Yes, that’s what they are, but RNA sounds scawy and vaccines cause autism and homosexuality, so something with some razz to it would be the right call…

“What’s going on here?! Is that an RNA experiment?”

“Umm. It’s a-… Um … Elixir.”

“Oh, I see. And how does it work?”

"…universe stuff. It’s complicated, sir. Sugar, nitrogen, phosphate… "

"Indeed. I’ve seen those on a cereal boxes before, and nitrogen is from that racing movie with the pretty women. What’s it do?

“It’s for…um…mosquito bites. Also a good degreaser. Jenkins has it in his head it cures viruses too, ha. We’d obviously have to test first.”

“I like that Jenkins. Which viruses?”

" The annoying ones."

“What about viruses that put thoughts about a person’s daughter in their head all the time?”

“…Sure.”

rolls up sleeves “Give it to me. Right above the lamprey hickey there’s a good vein. You’re doing good work here, son. We’ll up the budget to get this Elixir of the Universe out to the shamans.”