So, not a joke, but a real lived experience. And then after a Stoned Mason joke.

My best friend at the time, his gf, and myself had eaten…a substantial dose of mushrooms. We’d started at 10 am and were catching the last bus from the city to the town we lived in, was just about 1am.

So it’s the 3 of us, we were all around 20, and a probably 40ish year old grung-punk skater on the bus. We were all sat at the back, having a chat and the following:

Guy:

Hey, you guys wanna smoke a joint?

One of us:

Sure, but uhhh, we live about a 4 hour walk from here. Where you hopping off?

Guy:

Naaaaaahhhhh maaaan! We’ll just open all the windows in the back here and smoke where we’re sitting!

Us:

Uhhhhhhhhh… aren’t you worried about getting kicked off the bus? There’s like…mirrors and shit, the driver can absolutely see us…

Guy:

Don’t worry man! Don’t you know the saying “Smoke in Mirrors”? It’s called Smoke in Mirrors because you CAN’T see smoke **IN** mirrors!

My own thoughts:

Jesus… I’ve eaten enough mushrooms to down a large dog and even I can tell this man has smoked himself within a C-Hair of his last brain cell…

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Stoned Mason Joke

This took me an embarrassingly long time to figure out was actually a joke.

So my old work/business partner back home is…a character.

Was a mega rockerboy through the 70s and 80s, plays bass with the same band he’s played with since '78.

He’s got some bits he likes to do. Ozzy, Jagger, what I’m pretty sure is the English guy from the first Wayne’s World.

We’re working away. He picks up a stone to install and inspects it. Then he says, in an absolutely…and I mean horrific, English accent:

And there I was…just…hangin out with the stones!