Maybe by now I’ve just steered clear of enough people on Lemmy that I’m actually seeing these comments, and maybe you were here the whole time, but there has been a noticeable (to me) increase in real allyship from men on here. Just want to let you know it’s greatly appreciated. If you didn’t comment this, chances are a woman would have and the backlash would have been worse. This comment 100% “gets it” and is what solidarity looks like. I was reading a post recently by a woman who is giving up on lemmy because of the rampant misogyny, and I have felt the same at times, but comments like this make me feel so much better about staying.
It’s unfortunate that people can’t exchange lived experiences, because so much of empathy and understanding is locked behind that. For what it’s worth, I believe most men replying here really just want to be given a chance and have their effort recognized, but their comments show a lack of understanding that’s hard to get at.
I was seeing a guy who had “all the right opinions” and we were in a situation where we were going to have to interact with someone who sexually assaulted children. I informed him ahead of time and was as clear as to the nature of this person. My boyfriend talked a big game about how he was going to refuse to engage with such an awful person etc etc. After they met, on our ride back from the event he asked if I could go into detail about the sexual assault this person allegedly did because after meeting him my partner was sure that it was just some kind of misunderstanding. He was sure he could just tell this guy was so nice and would never do such a thing. They got along great. How do you explain to someone that “just asking questions” or “wanting to know the facts” is not the right response, especially only AFTER meeting someone. This kind of interaction feels similar to me because on its own it’s understandable to not want to be lumped in with musk, it’s understandable to want to know all the facts, but in context the pushback is the problem.
My comment is getting a bit off topic, so just generally thank you for being in the comments saying this. It’s refreshing to see it and it’s greatly appreciated.
thanks for that. it is depressing, seeing a bunch of men acting like they are the “victims” here. in a community focused on women.
that’s exactly the sort of response elon musk is looking for when he says “empathy is weakness.” people just aren’t paying enough attention to realize how little attention they’re paying
Maybe by now I’ve just steered clear of enough people on Lemmy that I’m actually seeing these comments, and maybe you were here the whole time, but there has been a noticeable (to me) increase in real allyship from men on here. Just want to let you know it’s greatly appreciated. If you didn’t comment this, chances are a woman would have and the backlash would have been worse. This comment 100% “gets it” and is what solidarity looks like. I was reading a post recently by a woman who is giving up on lemmy because of the rampant misogyny, and I have felt the same at times, but comments like this make me feel so much better about staying.
It’s unfortunate that people can’t exchange lived experiences, because so much of empathy and understanding is locked behind that. For what it’s worth, I believe most men replying here really just want to be given a chance and have their effort recognized, but their comments show a lack of understanding that’s hard to get at.
I was seeing a guy who had “all the right opinions” and we were in a situation where we were going to have to interact with someone who sexually assaulted children. I informed him ahead of time and was as clear as to the nature of this person. My boyfriend talked a big game about how he was going to refuse to engage with such an awful person etc etc. After they met, on our ride back from the event he asked if I could go into detail about the sexual assault this person allegedly did because after meeting him my partner was sure that it was just some kind of misunderstanding. He was sure he could just tell this guy was so nice and would never do such a thing. They got along great. How do you explain to someone that “just asking questions” or “wanting to know the facts” is not the right response, especially only AFTER meeting someone. This kind of interaction feels similar to me because on its own it’s understandable to not want to be lumped in with musk, it’s understandable to want to know all the facts, but in context the pushback is the problem.
My comment is getting a bit off topic, so just generally thank you for being in the comments saying this. It’s refreshing to see it and it’s greatly appreciated.
thanks for that. it is depressing, seeing a bunch of men acting like they are the “victims” here. in a community focused on women.
that’s exactly the sort of response elon musk is looking for when he says “empathy is weakness.” people just aren’t paying enough attention to realize how little attention they’re paying