things are in fact going extremely badly but we’ll see if they pick up starting tomorrow night for reasons that will preclude me being here for about a week (seeing my SO)

  • Ellvix@beehaw.org
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    I got a kitten. Want to see pictures?

    Edit: Here’s us having cuddles on her first day home.

    a cuddly kitten girl

    a cuddly kitten girl

    She can be loud.

    she's loud

    She’s decided this is her bed. I need to chase her off and get a clean one!

    kitten sleeping on a dinner plate

  • caffinz@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    Not so great. My mom died a week ago, I got fired 6 weeks into paid family leave and I’ve started to realize that drinking is becoming a habit :(

    • Nooch@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      Im so sorry to hear about your mother passing last week. We love you so much here, and there are people that care about you. jobs come and go, and they always are going to look out for their best interests. I think it takes a lot of courage to recognize a growing bad habit, I hope you can find a healthier outlet to process your stress and griefs.

      • caffinz@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        Thank you. Yeah, I’ve been applying to places but a lot of job postings these days are scams. Alcoholism killed my brother just under 2 years ago so I generally try not to drink. Ironic eh? :/

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          I’ve found that stress and grief cause me to be somewhat self destructive so that isn’t surprising to me. Take care of yourself. Although you’ll carry your mom’s death forever, the pain will get better and the joyful memories that you have will get their color back. Hang in there. We’re all rooting for you!

    • mitch@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      Holy shit, I’m so sorry to hear this. I’m happy to lend an ear if you need it, just send me a pm or hit me on Matrix.

    • LilBagOfBunnies@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      That’s wonderful news! I hope that you’re feeling okay otherwise and that it wasn’t a scare based on symptoms that you don’t have answers for yet.

  • Barry Zuckerkorn@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    Sounds like most people commenting in this thread are going through some challenges right now. I’m hoping things turn around for everyone soon.

    I’ve been having a great week.

    • I got myself a working install of Linux on my laptop. I still have things I need to fix, but I’ve made it further than I actually expected in just 2 evenings after work.
    • My kid is making great progress with learning how to swim.
    • My job remains stressful but I had a few little victories that will make my September much easier than expected (or at least clear the plate a bit so that even if some things happen, they won’t pile onto an existing shit sandwich).
    • I just bought some really awesome tomatoes at the farmer’s market, and can’t wait to incorporate into sandwiches starting tomorrow (tonight I gotta go buy some fresh sourdough to really complete the entire effect of a delicious sandwich). I love tomato season!
    • I made it back to the gym for the first time in a month. Lots of travel in July (mostly work, but also a family vacation in the middle) put me in hotels without room in my schedule to do any real workouts, although I guess I walked way more than I normally do while traveling (one day I hit 15,000 steps almost entirely in airports). I feel better when I’m working out regularly, so being home is helpful for resetting that part of my routine.

    I’m feeling pretty great! Sending good vibes to everyone else in this thread, whether they’re having good weeks or bad weeks.

    • Overzeetop@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      Good to hear good news. The deer pretty much cropped my tomato plants right back to the small tomato cages, knocking most of the protected tomatoes off in the process.

      On the bright side, my daughter is home from college for a month and the weather here in the Appalachian mountains has cooled a bit so there are likely some nice evening walks in my future.

    • LastOneStanding@beehaw.org
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      I saw your post talking about how you got it going in another community. Good for you! Linux still does not play well with laptops. It’s especially hard on the laptop you’re trying to get it working on. The older the hardware, the better the Linux is still the rule of thumb. As far as the rest, also happy for you. Your enthusiasm is contagious.

      • potpie@beehaw.org
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        I had amazing luck getting Linux running nicely, way-back-when, with an Acer Aspire One. I’ve stayed with that product line for all my laptops and so far it’s paid off. But then there’s also options like System76 for nice machines with Linux pre-installed.

      • whelmer@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        Debian has always worked pretty easily for me on ThinkPads. I guess it depends what you’re trying to run it on.

        • LastOneStanding@beehaw.org
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          It really depends on what hardware you have. A new laptop just released last month will have a ton of issues with any linux distro. The guy we’re replying to installed linux on a mac laptop. Not ever easy! The ThinkPads often work well with any distro, as far as I know. Same goes for HP laptops. BUT, most gaming laptops are a no-go, unless you’re ready to spend hours tweaking after installation.

    • mitch@beehaw.org
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      Nice job on diving into Linux. It’s a love that never ends, except when you’re wildly confused. Then it resumes once you figure it out.

  • LastOneStanding@beehaw.org
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    I’m new here but since you asked and this is the first thing I see in my feed, I’ll tell you. My mom died the day before yesterday. So, not starting the week off as I’d like to. I didn’t like the way I was informed about. A very impersonal and uppity email from my older sister I am not on speaking terms with. So, I’ll just plod along and find a bright side somewhere! To all of you who are having it rough this week: I’m hoping things get better for you.

    • coyotino [he/him]@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      good lord my friend. sorry to hear that! losing a parent is never easy, regardless of what kind of relationship you had with them beforehand. Hoping things get better for you, too ❤

      • LastOneStanding@beehaw.org
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        Thank you. I lost her quite a while ago because my older sister cut off my ability to communicate with my mother quite a while ago. I live on another continent so I couldn’t really do much about that to fight it. In a lot of ways, I mourned the loss of my mother a long time ago, so her actual physical death is something that I already mourned. Still, it really sucks, but my mom was unwell for quite a while, and she is no longer unwell. That’s a good thing. Thanks for being so nice with your comment. I’ll be just fine. Situations like this in my personal life remind me about all the things I need to do to protect people from these kinds of unpleasant situations that are unfair.

        • the_itsb (she/her)@beehaw.org
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          It says a lot about your character that your reaction to your own hardship is that you want to work to make sure other people are protected from it. We’re lucky to have you in the world and on this instance. Thanks for being you.

  • silentdanni@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    This year has been without a doubt one of the most difficult years for me. My relationship is not going great, we may be headed towards a divorce. I’m also no longer talking to my best friend of 18 years. She was someone who had been in my life since I was a kid and I feel so lonely without her.

    I’m trying to get my routines in check but just going through the day without having a breakdown seems like a Herculean effort.

    • coyotino [he/him]@beehaw.org
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      Ugh that’s a brutal combo. You deserve a medal for each day you get through, with or without a breakdown. You got anyone else in your support system that you can turn to?

      • silentdanni@beehaw.org
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        Thanks. I have a therapist who’s been helping me to make sense of it all. Otherwise, I’ve just been trying to keep myself busy, going to the gym, trying new hobbies and so on. Hopefully, things will get easier as time goes on.

  • Eddie@lemmy.lucitt.social
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    I’m at the airport right now, about to leave for a week long vacation to Hawaii! I’ve never been before so it’ll be a super fun way to celebrate my one year anniversary with my wife!

    Sorry to hear about the rough times OP. From one human being to another, keep doing your best and know that there’s another human somewhere hoping you are well. Cheers.

    • ElectricAirship@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      My week has been pretty good, I work in a library so I spend my lunch digitizing any book I want or at least feel that it should be saved digitally.

      • Eddie@lemmy.lucitt.social
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        That’s cool! I used to work in a bookstore but always felt like it was trying to put a price on reading. Library would feel a lot homier for me I feel. Thank you for what you do! If it weren’t for Libraries as a kid I probably would have never fallen in love with reading.

    • alyaza [they/she]@beehaw.orgOPM
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      Sorry to hear about the rough times OP. From one human being to another, keep doing your best and know that there’s another human somewhere hoping you are well. Cheers.

      i’m not very optimistic but we’ll see. a fundamental problem is i’m locked into my living situation for the foreseeable future unless something crazy happens, and my current living situation is constant and droning suicide fuel. also not really in a position to seek mental health professionals

  • Gaywallet (they/it)@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    Mentally, kind of a mess. Preparing for a planned surgery later this month. Struggling with a newer relationship and someone whom seems to regularly be around but rarely be around for me. Getting over strep throat and hating the antibiotic, but sticking to the schedule. In good news, I have a date with a partner I’ve only seen once over the last two months that I’ve been missing and I’m celebrating a 4 yr anniversary with another tomorrow 😄

  • beepnoise@beehaw.org
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    Seeing what folks have said, I kind of feel bad griping about my own issues, but as of now I have nobody else to really talk to (or at least that’s the way it feels), so here goes:

    • Work has been up and down. It has been super stressful and intense at times - especially on Mondays, and then calms down as the week goes on. It doesn’t help that we have half our team members and next week our team lead is going on holiday. And next week is going to be the start of support, where I’ll need to be available 24/7 (it’s a thing, and apparently it pays super well and also can help for a promotion)
    • I bought a house in March and things are still ongoing from the sellers side despite being virtually done on my side. This wouldn’t be so stressful had it not been for the fact that I have a mortgage offer that will expire at the end of October, and given how the seller wants 4 weeks to paint their new house before I get the keys(!!!) that means I’ll need to factor the 4 weeks into the expiry and eventually consider putting my foot down and pulling out (which I don’t want to do, but interest rates have drastically changed in the UK, so I’m unlikely to have an extension or the same offer again)
    • A few weeks ago I got shingles, and I had medicine for that (stress from house and work). Went over to my sisters and she started talking to me about the foot fungus she saw on my feet as well as fungal infection behind my ear. The behind-the-ear requires a shampoo, so that’s simple. The toenail fungal infection requires toenail clippings as well as blood test to check my liver. Yesterday the results came back slightly borderline for my kidneys, so I’m going to have to repeat the results (also I have to avoid alcohol and eat more fruit). At this point I can’t help but feel like my body is a Rube Goldberg machine and while it’s nice that my sister is spotting these issues, it just makes me feel slightly depressed about my body.
    • The weather in the UK as well as the health issues has left me a bit house bound, and more importantly, I feel incredibly lonely.

    But on the plus side:

    • I have a very, very well paid job that seems to actually compensate me for the effort I put in - much, much more than my last job
    • I have a genuinely very caring family that wants the best for me
    • I’m lucky to live in a time when I can just write this post and several strangers will see it, even if they don’t respond. In some ways, the loneliness is much more in my head
    • I already ate 3 bits of fruit yesterday and I had one before my dinner (this is actually quite a big deal for me) :D
    • I’m self aware enough to spot when I’m catastrophising and (hopefully) I can make an active effort to nip it in the bud. Sometimes its easy, and other times it’s mentally exhausting.
    • I’m sure there are others out there who are doing much worse with taking care of their bodies than me.
    • I am not depressed yet. I may have bouts of anxiety through the day, but I think this is manageable.
    • gerbilOFdoom@beehaw.org
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      Your difficulties are real, valid, and not relative to any other person’s. It’s okay to have them and discuss them.

      Keep watching your own brain when you can; you cannot be successful every time but you improve your brain hygiene a little bit each time you do. Sometimes you’ll have to let it happen for bit of time while you regain enough energy to stop catastrophising and that’s okay too. The exhaustion you get from stopping it just means you’re doing good work.

      • beepnoise@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        So I have phenylketonuria, and a big part of this is being in tune with my brain and my mental/emotional/physical well-being as to try and gauge when my phenylalanine levels are high.

        Since I’ve had my phenylalanine levels so low, I was able to correctly find out my levels were high.

        As to catastrophising, unfortunately that is a symptom of high phe levels. I’ve been working on lowering my phe levels, and today was the first day I didn’t feel any anxiety or catastrophe despite starting something 24h support at work today for a week.

    • rvedotrc@beehaw.org
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      I totally hear you on the fruit thing. I wish I was better at stopping the catastrophising.

      • beepnoise@beehaw.org
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        I feel a lot better today. I think part of it is writing things out and actually visualising my situation. I think another part was your reply, which helped me feel seen, so thank you.

  • cambriakilgannon@beehaw.org
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    Not good. My dog has congestive heart failure. I’m trying to cope with it but it’s hard. Got him after I got out of the military, was really fucked in the head for a while and was having a really hard time and he pretty much saved my life. Considering selling my car to help pay for a 40,000 dollar heart surgery that University of Florida might be able to do but… I know that’s just fucking crazy. Too much money and they probably have so many people lined up that it’s not possible anyway. My newest hobbies are crying and listening to his heart murmur every night as I go to sleep

    I feel like if I don’t do everything in my power to help him then it’s my fault but I know that isn’t true and I’ve given him a good life.

    My dad is dying too, he doesn’t want to talk about it. It’s weird because I kind of feel indifferent about it. I don’t know. I feel lost right now. I’m trying to be objective. Dogs die, people die. I’ve lost plenty of friends and family and obviously the world keeps on ticking. Right now it’s pretty rough, beehaw. I’ll keep on keepin’ on, I guess.

    • whelmer@beehaw.org
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      I’m sorry, that’s really hard. I lost my cat at a hard time last year when I was under a lot of stress and I cried quite a bit. Only thing I’ve cried about in years. He knows that you love him and that you’re there for him.

    • BricksDont@beehaw.org
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      I’m so sorry. Losing a pet is a special kind of pain, and thinking about losing a parent on top of that must be way too much to process at once. Sending love.

    • Rentlar@beehaw.org
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      I just started a new job not too long ago after a year of being unemployed…

      It’s hard and the whole recruitment process is soooo bullshit 90% of the time.

      You can’t force someone to give you a job and most of the time that you don’t land a job it’s not because of you. I know I blamed myself for not having a job many days, but in reality the circumstances are not in your control.

      Some HR take months to move their arse on a requisition, stringing you along with boilerplate responses to followups for months. Some months I got no bites, other months I got 3 interviews.

      Get references, study (whether in a school, books at the library in areas of interest), figure out what kind of jobs you want, apply to whatever jobs you think you want, get people you know to refer you to their work, take certifications, go to industry conferences of your interest, join professional groups. Get a recruiting agency to help you. Go to employment counseling.

      It took me a year despite doing every single one of these things. Some days it was easy for me, other days it was hard even without any specific disability. Do your best, be the best yourself you can be, don’t let being without a job define yourself. Look more towards the person you want to be, and start with changing the things you can change rather than what you can’t.

      • Ellvix@beehaw.org
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        Very good point about it not being about you. I didn’t really understand that until I was on the other side and doing some hiring. Sometimes we’d have no qualified applicants for months (like, we had a junior dev position and got people applying that knew nothing about code), and other times we’d have 10+ applicants that were perfect and we wanted to take all of them.

        I used to think if I didn’t get a job it was on me. Turns out it’s a numbers game (assuming you’re not applying for something like a junior dev position with only cust service experience).

      • Shhalahr@beehaw.org
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        The real problem I have with conditions embedding themselves in how I define myself is with the depression rather than the unemployment. I’ve only been unemployed a little over thirteen months. The depression is a chronic problem I’ve experienced on one level or another for roughly twenty years. Between the two, the depression definitely strikes deeper to the core. It’s just that the current episode is pretty tough to deal with as long as I am dealing with the isolation created by this unemployment.

    • LastOneStanding@beehaw.org
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      Well, that sucks. Don’t give up on the job applications. It’s a real pain in the rear looking for jobs. Don’t let the no people discourage you. I hope something inspires you a little to take away some of the blahs. Feeling depressed is just… what is the adequate adjective to describe it? It sucks and I hate feeling it. I’m sure you don’t like it either. We’ll leave it at that.

  • mitch@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    Just dropping in to mention that Sync for Lemmy is available for Android. It’s pretty good. Early (you can’t submit stuff yet), but it’s getting updated every day. Just FYI in case anyone was as excited as I was, haha.

    • BricksDont@beehaw.org
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      Nice, thank you! Trying it out now. Font is crazy small (even after trying to make it bigger) and there seems to be some comment nesting issues, but excited to see it evolve :)

  • Google@lemmy.ml
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    Everything is worse now. Family troubles. Nobody wants to give up their position on anything to meet in the middle. Nobody deserves this. We all deserve better of each other.

  • Nicktar@beehaw.org
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    I was at a small roleplaying convention last week. It was great to meet the others again after about a year and game with them. Unfortunately someone was rather generous with their flu viruses and I got my personal helping. So I’m on sick leave for the second say but luckily, according to the test it’s just a flu and not the big bad C. On Monday I clobbered together a small template for my sister to build fake computer screens as props for TV shows… All in all a mixed bag of some good stuff and some annoying things…

  • Face@beehaw.org
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    Not good. I’ve had three who were very close to me die of old age, so I’m slated to go to two funerals in the next couple of weeks. I’m hoping that things turn around, but that feels like asking for too much.