Disclaimer: like most pedophiles, I have never approached a child with anything sexual or otherwise inapporpriate, and I don’t plan ever to do so. I recognize the harm in such actions, and I don’t want to hurt the very people I love. If you expect AMA with a child molester, this ain’t it.

The account is a throwaway, hope you’ll understand this decision given the sensitivity of the topic.

Edit: Thank you for keeping civil and genuine in your questions. I did envision hostility, yet here you are, amazing as always. Lemmy is a wonderful place to be, thanks to you all!

Edit 2: Apparently we have another brave pedophile here in the comments, and he came with a good note I should include in the post: if you find yourself attracted to minors, that’s okay. Acting on your desires is dangerous, but having them isn’t. If you’d like to have some support and/or community that would help you get your bearings or just listen without any prejudice (we’re all in the same boat), there are places that can help you. Visit VirPed (18+) or MAP Support Club (13+; scroll down for details), or refer to other resources through the MAP Resources website.

  • magnetosphere@kbin.social
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    18
    ·
    9 months ago

    How difficult is it not to act on your feelings? How angry do you get at (god, nature, the universe, whatever) for burdening you with something so universally reviled?

    I gotta admit, I’m a little freaked out, but your tone and straightforward honesty has helped quite a bit.

    • Saint@r.nf
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      28
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      9 months ago

      Hi! Not OP, but also a pedophile. I used to get really angry at God/the universe, in fact it’s one of the reasons I left my religion (how could a loving God make me or anyone else this way?) but today I accept it about myself and I’m not mad anymore. I’m out to several friends who all know me well, and so far all but two people have accepted me.

      I’m going to turn your original question back on you a little bit. If you see someone in your day-to-day life that you’re attracted to, but you don’t have consent to do anything with, how difficult do you find it now to act on your feelings? It’s the same for me. In the words of Penn and Teller, I do rape and murder all I want. And that amount is zero.

        • Saint@r.nf
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          8
          ·
          9 months ago

          lol, thank you. People tend to think of us as morally bankrupt with out of control sexual impulses and urges. The truth is that… we’re people just like you in many ways. Different in some, but fundamentally the same. We need help and support and acceptance the same as anyone else.

          • Rodeo@lemmy.ca
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            edit-2
            9 months ago

            People tend to think of us as morally bankrupt with out of control sexual impulses and urges.

            There are a lot of parallels to be made between the current perception of pedophiles and the perception of homosexuals in the mid 20th century.

            Alan Turing, inventor of the modern computer, was chemically castrated for being gay. They wanted to control his urges, because sodomy was seen as immoral. We look back on that now with horror at how we could have been so inhumane.

    • Verto@r.nfOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      18
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      9 months ago

      At first, there was a lot of frustration involved in this for me, but currently I’m simply mentally incapable of crossing the line. I just get instant aversion on the thought of making this a reality - similar, in some ways, to violent thoughts someone normal might have. (you might imagine yourself killing someone that made you super angry, but you’re not gonna actually do this, are you?)

      As per being angry at the world, I certainly get that sometimes. Having such attractions, even when you have “normal” ones too, is certainly living on hard mode. But then, there are many others with their own issues and their own struggles we know nothing about. Plenty of people were treated poorly by the merciless reality.