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Teknevra@lemmy.blahaj.zoneM to QueerDefenseFront@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish · 19 hours ago

🤨❔️

lemmy.blahaj.zone

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🤨❔️

lemmy.blahaj.zone

Teknevra@lemmy.blahaj.zoneM to QueerDefenseFront@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish · 19 hours ago
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  • DagwoodIII@piefed.social
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    19 hours ago

    Nope.

    It’s a sin because every sperm is sacred and should only be used for one purpose.

    Any sex act that isn’t cismale trying to impregnate a cisfemale is a sin.

    That’s according to them.

    • Lumidaub@feddit.org
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      19 hours ago

      What if no sperm is involved at all?

      • TexasDrunk@lemmy.world
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        14 hours ago

        That’s my vasectomy loophole! I can now bang anyone I want because the boys are locked down.

      • SinningStromgald@lemmy.world
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        18 hours ago

        No sperm means no ejaculation for you, ever.

        • Lumidaub@feddit.org
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          18 hours ago

          Yes. I wouldn’t know where to ejaculate from anyway. I hear some other humans have similar anatomic peculiarities. So me having sex with one (or several) of them would be fine?

          • SpikesOtherDog@ani.social
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            12 hours ago

            Just use your nipples.

          • Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works
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            15 hours ago

            Apparently Romans 1:26 implies it’s not, according to antilesbian folks, but having read it carefully I say, as long as it’s natural to you, it should be fine. Not that I give a shit what Paul has to say about what I do with my body.

        • tburkhol@lemmy.world
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          17 hours ago

          Vasectomy.

          • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            17 hours ago

            People who have had vasectomies still ejaculate. The ejaculate just doesn’t contain any sperm.

            • humanamerican@lemmy.zip
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              17 hours ago

              The phrase is “every sperm is sacred”, not “every ounce of semen is sacred”

    • TheTechnician27@lemmy.world
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      19 hours ago

      Got it. Have gay sex, then felch, then transplant. Just as God intended.

      • humanamerican@lemmy.zip
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        17 hours ago

        Have my grossed out upvote please

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      17 hours ago

      So what you’re saying is that if a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate?

      You mean that every sperm is needed in your neighborhood?

    • damnthefilibuster@lemmy.world
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      18 hours ago

      Also, that’s why they don’t call it sex. They call it sodomy. Which according to them is a sin.

    • Townlately@feddit.nl
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      18 hours ago

      Please don’t nocturnal emish

      • stray@pawb.social
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        17 hours ago

        I spent a moment trying to remember who Emish is in the Bible before realizing.

        • edgemaster72@lemmy.world
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          15 hours ago

          I think they’re related to that pop singer, Billie Emish

          /j

  • mydoomlessaccount@infosec.pub
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    18 hours ago

    “Thou shalt not lay with a man as thou would a woman.”

    But, if you’re a gay man, you wouldn’t want to lay with a woman.

    So, if you have sex with a man, it wouldn’t be “as thou would [lay with] a woman,” since thou wouldn’t lay with women in the first place.

    So, see? It was never a sin!

    (Gets more complicated when you’re bi, but I think if you only bottom for men and top for women- or vice-versa- it probably still works out)

    • bdonvr@thelemmy.club
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      14 hours ago

      That’s also why I don’t lay with them. We get in the sex swing

  • winkly@lemmy.world
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    19 hours ago

    It’s not gay if your penises touch inside a woman.

  • CerebralHawks@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    19 hours ago

    Wasn’t that the justification the Greeks used in ancient times? Sex with the wife at home and with the guys at the coliseum or wherever for fun or sport…?

    • LumpyPancakes@piefed.social
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      19 hours ago

      And commerce…

  • saltnotsugar@lemmy.world
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    19 hours ago

    We need more sex lawyers.

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