• CommissarVulpin@lemmy.world
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      3 hours ago

      It’s hurtful that they think I’d even be threatening and nasty. That they just immediately assume I’m some kind of monster. It makes me feel like I have no value.

      • noretus@crazypeople.online
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        58 minutes ago

        You don’t know that anyone who responds this way actually thinks this. There are a limited amount of ways to communicate that they’re not interested and over-explaining and hedging their niceness would also just backfire. They gave exactly as much explanation as needed. It may come off a bit stiff because the tone is neutral (and they only use “I” sentences - speaking only what they know to be true instead of projecting with “you” sentences).

        You may want more validation and that’s fine. But nobody owes it to you. You say “they just immediately assume I’m some kind of monster” - but you could be doing the same thing in assuming their motivations when they only speak neutrally.