So a stabbing at a synagoge in Manchester today. The presumed suspect is an Arab/Middle-Eastern looking man and it is suspected he was wearing a bomb belt too.

This is just going to accelerate the already sky high tensions between white supremacists and the rest.

Third day of Trintellix (5 mg).

I’m also taking less Lexapro and will switch off completely; psychiatrist will most likely up the dosage of the Trintellix as well to 10 mg or even 20 mg.

Not sure how I should be feeling, but I do feel fine right now.

Been really unfocused the last couple of days, they’ve been a blur. Need to snap out of it, maybe get some more sleep if I can find the time for it.

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Watching the flotilla live feed. I think it’ll get deadly in the next 3 or 4 hours.

I need to apologise to all the comrades who were saying Corbyn is controlled opposition, a distraction, and no better than Bernie.

You were right all along and I should’ve seen it back when Corbyn as the Labour leader banned socialists who supported Palestine for supposed “antisemitism” while keeping all the Blairites, neoliberals and imperialists like Starmer. I thought “he has to do that to stay electable and to survive in British parliamentary politics” but the truth of the matter is he was perfectly content to strangle the new party in it’s infancy the moment he felt attacked from the left, and suddenly being electable or survival of the party didn’t matter at all.

For context, he announced a new party with Zarah Sultana, she quit the Labour party for this, and the moment she went out of line (by launching the membership portal without checking with him first) he immediately threw a public tantrum, threatened legal action, sent a mass mail to all subscribers that the portal is “unautharised” and “if any direct debits have been set up, they should be immediately cancelled” and so on.

The portal was doing great by the way, it had 20,000 paying members within 3 hours of announcement which is completely unprecedented and he wrecked it and completely killed the momentum because he felt threatened by a young, brave, socialist, brown Muslim woman.

Now it seems Zarah has been completely sidelined, there is no mention of her in any communications, and today Corbyn officially registered the party with the Electoral Commission with himself as a sole leader and a transphobic, socially conservative landlord as Nominating Officer.

This is a complete betrayal and I feel sick thinking back to how I kept supporting him. He’s a wrecker, I was being a lib and I was wrong.

Oh, btw, I’m on my second day of taking the lowest dosage of Trintellix. (5 mg)

I’m taking 15 mg of Lexapro to ween off of it.

Eventually, I’ll be on just the Trintellix and maybe a higher dosage.

So far, so good, I think.

Did a vote test for The Netherlands to see which parties I should vote on and I passed the lefty test as all top 6 parties are left wing

Interesting discussion so far in here:

https://lemmygrad.ml/post/9298177

The Global Sumud Flotilla is less than 150 nm from Gaza: https://globalsumudflotilla.org/tracker/#help

I have internalized learned helplessness the way only a materially comfortable petite bourgoisified first worlder can and I hate that about myself.

Today is the Truth and Reconciliation in Canada in recognition that the children from Native American, Inuit, and Metis groups were imprisoned in the series of slave camps, human experimental camps, and death camps under the pretense of “Indian Residential Schools” and fake cultural assimilation since the 1850s. Although the European settlers claimed that the fake schools ended in 1997, there are evidence that the fake school death camps continued in secret after that time.

For the Truth and Reconciliation, the European settlers’ government in Canada confessed that there were some vague child abuses and cultural genocide. However, they refused to confess that the fake schools are slave camps and death camps in disguise. They continue to deny that the Nazi Holocaust were inspired by the Indian Residential fake Schools from the British diaspora or that the fake schools provide free child labor, free stolen inheritance from the extortion of money from Indigenous parents, and demonic blessing from child sacrifices to demons. The free riding over Indigenous groups from the fake schools ensure victory against the hard working innovative scary red Soviets who gain the permission from the invisible hand to manage lazy Capitalists in Pax Americana. However, the cost of free riding over Native Americans, Inuits, and Metis is the current need to import enormous number of immigrants of Non-European origin to compensate for the declining number of Indigenous babysitters.

In fact, they continued to frame the First Nation people for the savage teaching from the Indian Residential fake Schools, the ongoing sabotage of reparation, planned imprisonment in harsh barren wasteland until the Indigenous people forfeit the reparation, planned starvation, planned chemical attacks, and planned assault by white rapists. The then Conservative Party of Canada, Stephen Harper, recognize that he could no longer hide all the free riding, savagery, and hypocrisy in the fake schools. To provide lip service, Stephen Harper open the Truth and Reconciliation speech where he confessed to the unrefutable cultural genocide to gain creditability to hide the more severe war crimes in the fake schools. He also boosted that the savage teaching in the fake schools is so strong that some fake school survivors cannot adjust to the civilized life of their parents and are demanding a return to savagery and cannibalism in the fake schools.

I’m realizing one of the fundamental problems with the field of mental health and therapy is the contradictory nature of knowing a person vs. not knowing. A therapist is supposed to have a certain level of professional detachment. But this also means they are unable to be in your corner the way a close friend would, preventing them from providing similar benefits. A therapist also just has a very limited scope of knowledge about you. Most of their information on you is based on the assumption that you’re a reliable narrator about yourself and your life, which may not be the case. I imagine there’s probably some training to look for signs of being an unreliable narrator, but overall, it’s not like they can just go check with other people you know to see if your stories are straight.

But even if everything you present is accurate, even if they read between the lines and learn tics you have, all they are seeing is “therapy you” during a very limited time frame. They don’t see how you are with friends, family, when you’re out and about, etc.

In short, they don’t really know you and if they did really know you, it would be hard for them to do their job in a professionally detached way. But without knowing you, most of what they can prescribe is generic advice. And that works some of the time. Like deep breathing techniques for anxiety, sure, that applies to a lot of people. But it’s also advice you can find with a web search. I think there is something valuable in basic back and forth with a professional, but beyond that, I’m not sure it does much and it might make things worse if the therapist is professionally compelled to get you to “change”. They can frame it as wanting to help you change in the ways that you want to change, but underneath that is the professional compulsion to show improvements relating to a standardized mental health designation of chronic issues.

I suspect a lot of people these days just need someone to talk to and that’s part of why turning to an LLM as “therapy” is enough for them. Because for them, they don’t really need the limited effectiveness therapy process in the first place. They just need something like the distance of talking to a therapist without feeling like they’re being pushed in a certain direction. I mean, isn’t it a bit weird that even in romantic relationships, the common refrain is you shouldn’t get into a partnership expecting to change someone, but in therapy, it’s basically the opposite; the expectation is that you come out different somehow. But if a romantic partner, a person who you’d expect to know you better than almost anyone, is not supposed to be someone who changes you, what qualifies a single individual who doesn’t know you from very limited conversation sessions to help you change?

P.S. Did not realize this would come out so long. Thought about doing it as a post in freechat, but don’t want it to come across as a broader anti-mental-health-field message. I have nothing against the intention of the field as a whole. Just have problems with it in practice and the logistical limitations of it.

Soon everything that was lost will soon come back. Not in the form it was before but in a stronger and brighter version.

Socialism is inevitable if we all fight from our respective place. A better world is possible.

Protests in Peru